If You Have To Google The Best Way To Murder Somebody Then You Probably Weren't Meant To Murder Anybody
Metro- David Russell, 25, met Maricar Benedicto, 19, online in 2009 over their mutual love of heavy metal.
Miss Benedicto flew to the UK from California to meet Russell, but the night before she arrived he searched for ‘hand-to-hand contact’, ‘ways to kill someone with your bare hands’, ‘how to kill someone and get away with it’, ‘best knife to kill someone’ and ‘how to knock someone unconscious’.
He lured her to woodland saying he had a present for her, told her to put her head back and hold out her palms, then slit her throat with a bread knife.
When she pulled away, Russell throttled her and screamed ‘Why won’t you die? You’ve ruined my life forever.’
Poor guy. He wanted nothing more than to kill someone, but he just wasn't gifted with the natural ability to do so. He had the look of a murderer, the musical tastes of a murderer, the will of a murderer, and literally none of the instincts necessary to achieve his goal. Say what you want about the kid's mental health and moral compass, but he had a dream and he did everything he could to achieve it. Unfortunately, the second he had to take to the internet to educate himself on the most simple aspects of homicide he should have realized that manslaughter wasn't in the cards. I can understand Googling the best places to rid yourself of a dead body, but 'ways to kill someone with your bare hands'? 'Best knife to kill someone with'? 'How to knock someone unconscious'? I've never had a thirst for blood in my life, and I could give educated answers to all those questions.
You don't become a feared executioner if you can't figure out on your own that the most deadly knife is the sharpest one. That's like LeBron James picking up his first basketball and needing a 'How-To' guide to make a lay-up. He would have never made it to the NBA without that most basic of intuition. No one taught Bill Gates how to turn on a computer or Jenna Jameson how to suck dick. Some people are just born with certain skills and some are not. The guy that clearly can't follow search results and used a bread knife to try to slit someone's throat? Probably meant to be more of a lover than a slayer, regardless of the maniacal thoughts constantly rummaging through his head.
LBS-The Browns may be 0-3, but their record isn’t getting Terrelle Pryor down.
Pryor still has confidence in his team and even said on Tuesday that he feels Cleveland can win the rest of their games.
“We’re so close to getting over that hump,” Pryor said, via Cleveland.com. “Once we get over that hump, I think we’re going to have a lot of success, even this year. We’ve got a chance to be real good and I don’t doubt anything. I think we can win all the rest of the games. It depends on our mindset. It depends on how we look at it. It’s just one week at a time.”
And here I was thinking that Drew Brees' optimism was insufferable. Just over here rolling my eyes when the Saints quarterback was talking about the team "eventually" coming together like the season isn't 16 games long and an 0-3 record isn't an absolute death sentence. His undying belief in a fatally flawed team might be delusional, but at least he's got the track record and clout to make such statements without getting fitted for a straight jacket.
Can you imagine being a long time Browns player that's been repeatedly beaten down by perils of playing in Cleveland, and having to listen to some dude who's had one good game in his career talk about how great your shitty team is? Waltzing around the locker room telling every person with a microphone that you're not going to lose for the rest of the season when you've started 3 separate losing quarterbacks in 3 games. I'm all for not quitting on your team before October even begins, but I'm also a big proponent for living in reality. No one knows the reality of inevitable failure quite like long tenured Browns players.
Terrelle Pryor's glass isn't even half full, it's basically brimming with false confidence. I just have to imagine that someone in his locker room is bound to slap it out of his hand if he keeps waxing poetic about a crappy situation like it's going to result in a Super Bowl appearance. The overly negative dude that thinks everything is doom-and-gloom is never well received in the locker room, but neither is the overly positive guy that thinks everything is sunshine and rainbows. Check a forecast one time for me Terrelle, because the sun has never come out in Cleveland 13 weeks in a row and there's literally not a single reason to believe it's going to start now.
Regent Hal Daub Of Omaha Wants The Nebraska Players That Sat For The National Anthem Kicked Off The Team
BSO- Regent Hal Daub of Omaha, a veteran of the Korean War and a former Omaha mayor, said in an interview that student-athletes at NU “are not supposed to do things that create disparagement or negative implications.”
“It’s a free country,” Daub told the Journal Star on Tuesday. “They don’t have to play football for the university either.
“They know better, and they had better be kicked off the team,” he added. “They won’t take the risk to exhibit their free speech in a way that places their circumstance in jeopardy, so let them get out of uniform and do their protesting on somebody else’s nickel.”
Excuse my ignorance, but what the fuck is a 'Regent'? You know what, fuck it, I am not even going to look it up and ruin it for myself. I'm just going to assume it's the whitest position of power that anyone can possibly hold. I don't mean to make a blatantly race related topic even more racial, but if you had to stake your entire net worth on it would you bet that there has or hasn't been an African American 'Regent'? Honestly, if you told me a 'Regent' was a job that was created a month ago to try to strong arm people kneeling during the National Anthem into abiding by social norms I would have absolutely no reason not to believe you.
Anyway, if you want glimpse into every FaceBook newsfeed in Middle America then you can watch the above video in which Nebraska linebacker Michael Rose-Ivey details the string of insanely racist threats directed at him by people that call themselves Cornhuskers "fans". I wouldn't really blame you if you didn't. It's pretty much exactly as bad as you'd expect it to be. That's what makes Hal Daub's insistence that he and those that joined him in taking a knee be kicked off the team seem relatively ridiculous. Cleverly worded, but relatively ridiculous.
I mean, I couldn't disagree with him more, but he made a decent point with that whole "free country" argument. Just letting a couple kids know that they the right to stand for what they believe in just like they have the right to get the fuck out of his state's university if they do. If that's not giving student-athletes full autonomy over their actions then I don't know what is. Poor Hal is just being misunderstood. He doesn't want people to feel silenced, he just wants them to speak up when he's not paying for it. I guess that brings us back to square one. Apparently a 'Regent' is someone that finances in-state scholarships. That's got to be it, because I can't see why else some old white dude would be threatening the free educations of peaceful protestors.
It's very possible that I am dead wrong. Hell, I'm no activism expert. It might even be extremely likely that I am dead wrong. After all, two teams - who usually hate each other's guts - deciding to unify and embrace togetherness is a positive message to send. You probably can't find too many people that would disagree with that sentiment, and that's why it's a gesture that seems more productive than it actually is.
I am not here to tell you how to feel about the trend that Colin Kaepernick kickstarted, but the truth is that it has made people start thinking critically about the racial injustices taking place in America. Due to the overwhelming stupidity running rampant in our country, those thought processes have produced a bag of results so mixed and volatile that Blake Griffin wouldn't even mess with it. Regardless, the fact that a peaceful protest against oppression has made some people so uncomfortable has - in turn - made it a huge talking point. Standing in a circle, holding hands, and (potentially) singing Kumbaya? Well, that really doesn't do much of anything. From what I can tell it just gets everyone in the stands to smile and clap in unison. Now, you could certainly argue that kneeling during the National Anthem isn't going to change the way African Americans are treated in the United States. That's a fair opinion. However, it will remind people that not everyone is okay with the current state of affairs. I can't say the same for linking arms and making a big ass oval like a confused kindergarten class. In theory I appreciate the teams addressing a serious societal issue, but doing so in a politically correct way that appeases even the most bigoted fan in the building feels like a bit of a copout.
What the FUCK is in that cup? Why is she wearing a George Washington wig? Does Walmart really not carry those fake ass jerseys in a size up? Which strip club do I need to stay FAR away from next time I find myself on Bourbon Street? Did I just get a glimpse of my first solid gold diaper? Does her granddaughter know she left the house looking like that? How does her primary caretaker still have a job? What does she use to keep her kicks so clean after grinding them up against random streetlights? Where did she get those fly ass knee highs?
This video poses so many damn questions, yet there's only one that the truest of members of the Who Dat Nation are dying to get an answer to...
Can she play safety?
Bold Move For the Bucks' President To Publicly Say That Milwaukee Is An Extremely Segregated, Racist Place
Uproxx- Milwaukee Bucks president Peter Feigin is an ambitious sort, like many venture capitalists. He wants to make the Bucks into “the most successful and respected sports entertainment company in the world,” and you can’t have that sort of goal for an NBA team in Wisconsin without some real gumption. And no matter what you think of that mission statement, the man has stones — the stones to stand before the Madison Rotary Club and say this about the Bucks’ hometown of Milwaukee:
“Very bluntly, Milwaukee is the most segregated, racist place I’ve ever experienced in my life. It just is a place that is antiquated. It is in desperate need of repair and has [been] for a long, long time.”
You know what they say, the truth hurts. And when that truth is that you run a professional basketball team in a region of the United States that still feels slighted by the abolition of slavery what's undoubtedly going to be hurt is your playoff chances. I'm not saying it's wrong of Peter Feigin to be open and honest about a very real problem facing the city he calls home. I'm just saying that it's not exactly the best free agency pitch I have ever heard. Pretty hard to build a franchise from the ground up when the foundation separates the black and white sides of town. I imagine that Jason Kidd woke up, saw this quote, chugged some whiskey, took a few spins around the block, popped a handful of prescription pills, crawled right back into bed, and pulled the pillow over his head. Better hope there's some Michael Jordan/Martin Luther King hybrid that slips to them in next year's draft, because I can't imagine too many of Colin Kaepernick's cronies are signing on to peacefully protest in front of a crowd that thinks the only kneeling they should be doing is in the back of the bus. As if Wisconsin wasn't already a hard enough sell to prospective players without a segregation problem. Now it's "Come play for the Bucks, as long as you don't cross over that imaginary border over there you and your family should be plenty safe!" Might want to tweak that marketing campaign before next July.
Why Am I Reading The Texts That Foreshadowed The Boating Accident That Took The Life Of José Fernández And Friends?
Local10- Rivero's friends said Fernandez was stressed out about something and needed to blow off steam on the water.
They said Rivero messaged another friend and was hesitant about going out on the boat, but went anyway to keep Fernandez close to shore.
Let me start by saying that I am completely aware of what year it is so I know that nothing that makes it's way into the cloud is off limits. As someone that writes about sports, 99% of the time I don't want it to be. However, I can't be the only person that doesn't feel right reading these texts, can I? It's not even solely because of the fact that the content of them provided an eery premonition that immediately sent a chill down my spine. It's because I didn't feel like I needed to know - in detail - what happened the night José Fernández and his friends were taken from us. That shouldn't have been any of my damn business, and - considering what led to their tragic passing was a 3AM boat ride - I didn't particularly want it to be.
Did we really need to see private texts to conclude that some poor decision making took place? Was a short backstory about José Fernández feeling stressed out not enough to piece together this tragic event? Why are we privy to the frantic messages being shot back and forth between friends immediately before one of them lost his life? I know the incessant need for more information drives the current state of media, but - goddamn it - is anything sacred? I can't - for the life of me - understand why this is a "Story @ 11" instead of a story being privately told to the grieving loved ones of three young men that met an untimely demise. I guess it means that the concerned person on the other end of the phone was complicit in creating an unnecessary news leak, but - I have to be honest - it feels like this is a disservice to the affected families. I'd imagine they'd probably like to mourn without being questioned on the intricacies of a life-altering catastrophe for the "benefit" of people that don't really need to fucking know. Being a public figure leaves every aspect of your life open to public dissection, but - christ - can't that invasive search for info end in the afterlife?
I Really Wish This Were A Video Of A Kennesaw State Football Player Fainting During His First Ever Flight
I promise you there is nothing I wanted more for than this to be an Instagram video of a college football player passing out from the anxiety of his first flight. That would have made for a fantastic viral clip. Unfortunately, I just don't buy his acting job one bit. I don't want to put on the tin foil cap, but I refuse to suspend disbelief to this extent. I have seen far too many people that are actually fearful of flying to believe that a kid who is smiling, talking, and taking deep breathes is seconds away from losing consciousness.
People who are genuinely afraid of planes don't have their headphones in as they take off. They don't don't let themselves get videotaped. They don't repeatedly look out the window. They don't have their hands anywhere but tightly gripped to both arm rests. Did you see a bead of sweat? I know I didn't, and that's a telltale sign of nerves gone haywire. I don't even mind if you're going to coordinate a mid-flight pass out with your friends, but at least try to make it look real. At least give me the opportunity to pretend it's authentic. A kid just goes limp on his buddy's shoulder and not one single person thinks to stop laughing and call for help? Yeah, that seems like a normal reaction that an aircraft full of kids would have to their teammate going comatose. I'm calling bullshit. Not just on the validity of this video, but on these kids for insulting the entire internet's intelligence.
I guess I should feel appreciative. I mean, at least the Saints didn't spend more than 5-10 minutes lulling me into a false sense of security before callously reminding me that it wasn't 2006 anymore. Tough to keep that nostalgic feeling when the team celebrates the 10 year anniversary of the most historic punt block in NFL history by comically botching one and giving their heated rivals a free pass right back into the game. From there on out even the most optimistic of Saints fans had to feel a little precarious about the direction in which the night was headed. Safe to say they weren't fully prepared for Matt Ryan to turn into something that resembled anything more than the overly average quarterback he is, but they at least had to have the inkling that things weren't going to go flawlessly. Not when a turnover (that ultimately wasted what turned out to be one of the Saints only defensive stops) pulled the plug on the sheer electricity that had filled the same building a decade before.
Here's the thing, there shouldn't have been one single Saints fan that thought last night was going to be easy. The laundry list of inactive players that came out prior to game time already had me sipping my drink a wee bit quicker, so it's not like there was no cause for concern prior to kickoff. Anyone that has watched this team throughout the years should have known that the impressive defensive effort put forth against the Giants was just as anomalous as the offensive futility displayed against the Giants. Now, did I expect the Falcons to drive down the field for 5 straight touchdowns like the players that held Eli, Odell, & Co. to three measly field goals were replaced by Pop Warner kids that were just there because their fathers were trying to live vicariously though them? No, can't say I did. Honestly, I was hoping there was a middle ground '85 Bears and...well...'14-'15 Saints. Apparently - when your 7th string cornerback is taking meaningful snaps - there really isn't.
That's not to put the full blame on injuries. There's no excuse for how easy the Falcons made it look. There's no excuse for being so inept at stopping your opponent that your quarterback - who was without his primary blindside protector and his biggest safety valve in the passing game - can't make one mistake without the game turning into a blowout at home. The Saints were undermanned, but I'll be damned if they didn't underperform in a game that could have pulled them into a tie for first place after what can only be described as a treacherous start to the season. Now they are 0-3, things looks just as bleak as they did at any point during the last few years, and - with the ways in which they've found to lose games - there's no reason to believe it's going to change. They'll somehow end up 4-4 and just a single game out of the division lead because that's just how this Deja-VooDoo works, but this season is destined to have a 7-9 finish. The fact that Saints fans can already see that writing on the wall should be genuinely concerning for every member of the organization...even those that just received 5 year extensions.
I think everyone that identifies themselves as a sports fan has heard the same rhetoric before - "It's just a game". Honestly, there's probably not a more frustrating phrase when you are experiencing second hand highs and lows that are characteristic of the latest crackhead on 'Intervention'. After all, the phenomenon of being so emotionally invested in the outcome of something we aren't even participating in is nearly impossible to explain to someone that doesn't feel the same way about sports. To us, having our entire mood effected by a bunch of strangers tossing around a ball or passing around a puck couldn't feel more right. In terms of rationale, however, the people that look at us like lunatics when we go from high-fiving and hugging to drowning our sorrows with the nearest alcoholic beverage in a matter of seconds are undoubtedly right in doing so. It's just extremely rare that a sports fan wins a logic based argument on the true importance of sports. That is, until moments like this happen...
You see, "it's just a game" doesn't explain what we saw last night. Dee Gordon stepping up to the plate, after 303 at bats without a home run, and blasting a leadoff solo shot in the first inning of a game dedicated to a fallen teammate is what? Merely a coincidence? A circumstantial product of boys being boys? Is anyone really prepared to argue that "it's just a game" as a grown man rounds the bases weeping thus bringing a tear to the eye of every single person watching him?
I have a little familiarity with games, seeing as I have been playing them since since I was sitting around in diapers literally trying to smash square pegs in round holes. Games don't feel like they are scripted by some supernatural power. A game could never truly pay tribute to a life prematurely lost. Games don't move people the way last night's events moved people. Games don't help their participants understand how fragile life can be. Games don't begin the healing process. José Fernández may be gone now, but are you really going to tell me the thing that familiarized us with the ridiculously perseverant story of such a jubilant, appreciative kid was just a game? In many (all) ways, what we saw last night transcended sports. However, in many ways what we saw last night is a prime example of what makes us infatuated by sports. Sometimes they are about so, so much more than just a game, and I highly doubt I would get an argument from the Marlins.
R.I.P. José Fernández
First and foremost - and I think I say this in every blog that references Metta World Peace - the fact that we let Ron Artest come to be known as Metta World Peace is nothing short of ridiculous. Just absolutely asinine that I'm just supposed to forget everything that has taken place during Ron Artest's ...uhhh...."illustrious" career, and start calling him by some unrealistic global goal that is most often pleaded for by women that are standing on stage caked in makeup trying to prove that there is more to them than a pretty face. I don't think I will ever get over the juxtaposition of the person in question with his current legal name, nor do I think I should be forced to - to be honest.
Even more inexplicable than one of the most volatile players that professional sports has ever seen transforming himself into some unofficial spokesperson for universal pacifism is said player using a sailing reference to somehow defend one of the most indefensible contacts in NBA history. The fact that Metta World Peace had almost no idea what he was talking about and he still managed to make (something that mildly resembled) sense of paying a player that was nothing more than a staple in a championship team's bench SEVENTEEN million dollars a year is the most stunning display of idiot savantcy I have ever heard. A ship without an anchor has a higher risk of getting lost at sea, and a bad basketball team without an overpaid, mediocre 7 footer is at higher risk of accidentally gaining momentum and progressing in any way, shape, or form.
Okay fine, now that I have drawn out the comparison it doesn't seem to be all that logical, but Ron Artest's having a rudimentary knowledge of boats is potentially the upset of the century. He had me convinced that Timofey Mozgov's 64 million dollar contract was a wise financial commitment for about half a second, and - somehow - that's half a second better than any explanation that has come from the Lakers front office.
Every Marlins Player Will Be Wearing Jose Fernandez' #16 When They Take The Field Against The Mets Tonight
It's difficult to put into words how awesome I think this gesture is, because the fact of the matter is that - through no fault of a Marlins organization that hasn't even begun to finish mourning - it doesn't even come close to expressing how important Jose Fernandez was to baseball. Honestly, I don't know of any one gesture that could pay enough of a tribute to a young, vibrant starting pitcher who truly loved the sport and was quickly blossoming into the face of his franchise. I don't know how an organization recovers from losing not only such a valuable piece of their team, but such an invaluable presence in their locker room. I don't know how grieving teammates lace up their cleats and take the field throughout the initial stages of the grieving process. I don't know how it's possible to focus on a game when the chilling remembrance of a fallen friend is stitched across the back of everyone in the dugout. There is so many unknowns in this situation, and that speaks to just how tragically rare it is. I guess if there is one thing I do know it's that we should all be rooting for the Marlins tonight. Sorry Mets fans, but this one's bigger than any amount of fan loyalty. This one's for Jose. Hopefully one day this is too...
Inexcusable Behavior From This Jaguars Fan That Got "Caught" On Camera Adjusting Himself In The Pool
Here's the thing, I am never going to be the type of person that tells a grown man where and when he can and can't adjust his genitals in the undying search for testicular comfort. About 99.9% of the time seeking underseas refuge while breaking from obvious social norms is the safe play. That's why I would usually feel inclined to give this guy a pass for innocently grabbing at his junk in front of a crowd like the all-too-evasive masturbating sea creature at your local aquarium.
Unfortunately, I just can't do that in this situation. It's not because I am a hypocritical asshole who thinks there is anything more important than proper ball placement. It's because this guy clearly knew he was on camera when he decided to slip that leather-skinned hand of his down his appropriately floral board shorts. I admit that literally getting caught dick-in-hand is an occupational hazard of taking care of manly business. That's why every case should be considered circumstantial. This case - which featured a man fixing his glasses, staring directly at himself on the Jumbotron before voluntarily deciding to cop a quick feel, and acting like it wasn't premeditated before the camera inevitably switched off to some uncoordinated kid dancing in the aisle - does not get the benefit of the doubt. You want to make sure your .5 seconds of fondling get blasted all over the internet then be my guest, but at least have the self-respect to make it look candid. I know it's Florida, but even the most perverted of Jaguars fans prefer their glimpses at overexposed, overweight old men to be truly voyeuristic.
Jesus Christ, pretty sure Martin Luther King Jr. just rolled over in his grave. If not because an African American athlete just distanced himself from his "blackness" then because of his egregious use of a double negative in doing so. If there is a realm where not everyone is meant to be an activist against an overwhelmingly controversial societal issue it's professional sports so - in theory - I don't have a problem with what Michael Crabtree was trying to say. It's the execution that could have used a little work. I don't want this to get misconstrued as me calling someone I've never met ignorant, but it's really tough for an answer to a relatively important question to have a more ignorant tone.
Is it fair that every black athlete is expected to have an informed, well-crafted opinion on the state of racial injustice in this country? Not remotely. With the amount of idiots that support Trump, you can only imagine how counterproductive things would get if every white athlete was presented with an opportunity to publicly comment on Colin Kaepernick. So Michael Crabtree is right in the sense that not everyone is built to stand in front of a microphone and field inquiries that refer to polarizing current events. Unfortunately, that's the situation that Colin Kaepernick has put his peers in with a gesture that the media can't seem to stop exploiting for content. I readily admit that I am part of the problem as I have written about a person kneeling during the National Anthem more than I ever thought possible. However, as much as he didn't ask to be a part of this, Michael Crabtree also becomes part of the problem when he can't conjure up a single predetermined, pseudo-intellectual response when asked about something that directly effects the lives of so many people like him. He doesn't need to be Martin Luther King Jr. (or read his most famous quotes off the back of Cam Newton's shirt for that matter), but with the platform he's been given he should simply embrace his position as a black athlete when asked about a cause that - hopefully - benefits his entire race in the long run.
Odell Beckham Jr. Losing A Fist Fight With A Field Goal Net Has To Be Unanimous Pick For Clip Of The Year
I am far from a Giants fan. In fact - regardless of my indifference towards the actual players on the team - I take much more joy in the Giants failures because of how insufferable the New York fanbase tends to be. That's why Odell Beckham Jr. catching a return punch - that was unquestionably a knock out blow to his pride - from a field goal net was such a glorious moment for me. Hell, it was a glorious moment for anyone that loves a hearty cackle. I don't have a huge problem with the potentially counterproductive amount of emotion he tends to show on and off the field, but I'll be damned if I am not going to laugh until I cry when those undisciplined outbursts bring tears to a professional athletes eyes. I respect Beckham as a competitor, but I appreciate him much more as a source of comedy. One handed catches that defy physics aren't exactly a dime-a-dozen, but short clips of athletes making themselves look stupid on camera are PRICELESS. Even the most die hard of Giants fans will chuckle at that video once their butts begin the post-penetration healing process, and that speaks to just how unbelievably hilarious it is. Doesn't even matter what you think about Odell Beckham's almost - dare I say - feminine displays of oversensitivity. If you can't appreciate when they produce 6 seconds of unrivaled viral entertainment then we will never...EVER...have a beer together. A grown ass man, who partakes in one of the most physically demanding sports on Earth, was armed with a helmet and STILL lost a fight to an inanimate object. It just doesn't get any better than that.
Fastest player to 3,000 receiving yards, quickest player to a gallon of sideline tears...
My instinctual reaction to seeing John Elway respond to a 17 month old tweet questioning his football knowledge is that it's an extremely petty practice for the General Manager of an NFL franchise to partake in. Upon further reflection it almost seems necessary. The type of person that @'s his team's management criticizing a 7th round selection that would have to overcome pretty hefty odds to play a down of meaningful football is the type of person that NEEDS to be put on blast. When a complete nobody goes out of his way to make his sure opinion on a seemingly miniscule personnel decision reaches someone far more in-the-know he opens himself up to that person reminding him of that opinion when it ends up being comically wrong. Typically I wouldn't want my GM wasting valuable time scrolling back through years of mentions to take passive aggressive jabs at every outspoken asshole on the internet, but I think the person wearing multiple Broncos' Super Bowl rings and sporting a 3-0 record with an unknown QB has built up enough clout with his fanbase to do so. John Elway temporarily silenced at least one self-important armchair executive, and that should be considered a win for all of us that have a Twitter handle and an intolerance for know-it-all fans who are dissecting picks well after anyone not waiting to be selected should still be watching the draft.
Listen, I was as shocked as anyone else when I heard the unfortunate, increasingly surreal news about Jose Fernandez. I am not going to pretend I was more familiar with his work than any other extremely casual baseball fan, but one look at a face that never ceased to display a seemingly endless amount of youthful exuberance shows you exactly how detrimental his absence will be. One look at the stats and one skimming of a scouting report provide plenty of context to just how much potential will never have the opportunity to be realized. One quick read of a life story that almost seems too daunting to be true shows you the true character of a man that was taken from us far too early. "Only the good die young" is generally just some empty phrase that people use to feel better about losing someone close to them, and it rings false in this instance too. The world didn't lose a good guy in the wee hours of a late September morning, by all accounts we lost a GREAT guy.
The death of a player who beat unimaginable odds to make it to this country and become a Major Leaguer provides us with an all-too-depressing realization - our favorite athletes aren't as mythically untouchable as we'd like to believe. It makes sense why we usually feel that way. After all, how many supernatural sports figures became nothing but a memory before they even began to sniff their prime? My recollection on a Monday morning might be limited, but the only losses of this magnitude that I can remember off the top of my head are Len Bias and Sean Taylor. That certainly speaks to how rare it is that those that provide us with entertainment through competition become victims of this all-too-fragile thing we call life.
However, maybe we shouldn't let ourselves be fooled by the rarity of such tragedies. The demise of 24 year old superstars with blindingly bright futures should never seem imminent, but maybe we shouldn't act as if they are impossible. As morbid as it sounds, anyone with an ounce of life experience has stood over the casket of a person that doesn't look old enough to have a diploma, never mind an obituary. Not everyone passes away in their sleep after living the fullest of lives. It's an unfortunate reality, but it's a reality nonetheless - even for those with transcendent skills and a perseverant past.
It's a cynical truth, but it won't be too long before we are able to watch baseball without thinking of Jose Fernandez, his effervescent smile, and his contagious love of the game he abruptly left behind. That's just a fact of the matter. Sports are much like life in that they do - indeed - go on. With that in mind, let's make sure the disastrous end to his existence isn't for naught. Obviously his loved ones and teammates should be the recipients of our thoughts, prayers, and every other intangible, compassionate gesture of sympathy. However, there are undoubtedly a bunch of people out there with the name 'FERNANDEZ' emblazoned upon the back of their Marlins jersey that feel like they just lost a friend. On behalf of those people, take an extra couple of seconds to appreciate the performance of your favorite athlete(s) every time they take the field of play. If the latest, greatest pitching ace to own the mound proved anything, it's that it could potentially be their last.
R.I.P. Jose Fernandez. Forget his abilities for a second, because it's his infatuation with a sport he overcame so much to be a part of that is just as irreplaceable...
Guardian- "Burnley forward Andre Gray has been suspended for four matches commencing with immediate effect for misconduct in respect of social media comments. It was alleged that six postings on his Twitter account were abusive and/or insulting and/or improper and/or brought the game into disrepute contrary to Rule E3(1)."
"It was further alleged that these breaches of Rule E3(1) included a reference to sexual orientation and/or gender and/or colour and/or race contrary to Rule E3(2). The player admitted to three of the breaches, and denied the remaining three were in breach of FA Rules."
"Following an Independent Regulatory Commission hearing yesterday, the remaining three breaches were found proven. The player was also fined £25,000, warned as to his future conduct and ordered to attend an FA education course.”
I gotta be honest here. When I first saw that a soccer player was being suspended for - apparently retroactive - social media posts from four years ago my first inclination was to defend him. Before I actually read them I was all set to conjure up some arbitrary statue of limitations for moronic things said in the moment on widely disseminated platforms. After all, a lot can change in four years. Hell, a lot HAS changed in four years. You know, such as the general public's feelings towards the LGBT community. I'm not saying it was okay to be a slanderous, homophobic asshole in 2012, but it's undoubtedly more unacceptable now. That seemed like a relatively decent argument to make until, well, I actually took a gander at the comments he was being suspended for.
Jesus Christ Andre, could you make it any tougher to defend you? Thought I was about to take the stand and argue that a 25 year old didn't understand the consequences of his words when he typed them out as an ignorant 21 year old kid. How the hell can I do that with a straight face when the words in question are both homophobic and homicidal?!? I can work with a young, dumb idiot being confused by alternate lifestyles, but I can't work with a young, dumb idiot wanting all people of that alternative lifestyle to die. I may have still been saying "faggot"conversationally amongst friends when I turned legal, but I damn sure wasn't putting a hashtag in front of it AND the arsonous way in which I wanted all gay people to perish.
Basically what I am saying is that I am dismissing myself from the case. These tweets are simply too vile for me to blame youth and naivety. It does seem weird to take action four years later, but the Premier League should suspend this jerk-off as long as they want. If not for being a prejudice dickhead then for actively trying to get more people to see his discriminatory bullshit by putting pound signs in front of his most offensive keywords.
An NMU Sexual Assault Victim Was Told She Wasn't Allowed To Talk To Her Peers About Her Suicidal Thoughts
NYMag- In the winter of 2015, a student at Northern Michigan University named Katerina Klawes sought out help at the university’s counseling office. She had been sexually assaulted in July of 2014 and wanted to talk about her experiences with a professional. On March 25, 2015, she got an alarming email from Mary Brundage, associate dean of students at NMU, which read, in part, as follows:
I received a report that others are worried about your well-being. I’d like to meet with you to discuss your options for support and see what I can do to help …
Our self-destructive policy is currently under review, as stated on top of the policy, so it is important that you know a couple of things. First, you will not be removed as a student for seeking help from the appropriate resources. You can use any of the resources listed below without worry. Second, Engaging in any discussion of suicidal or self-destructive thoughts or actions with other students interferes with, or can hinder, their pursuit of education and community. It is important that you refrain from discussing these issues with other students and use the appropriate resources listed below. If you involve other students in suicidal or self-destructive thoughts or actions you will face disciplinary action. My hope is that, knowing exactly what could result in discipline, you can avoid putting yourself in that position.
Some might think that seeing one of your friends bleeding out after swan diving from a 4th floor dormitory window would have a more detrimental effect on the future of a student's education than having a conversation that could potentially prevent that from happening. It's a good thing that Mary Brundage isn't one of those people. Could you imagine the ramifications of a sexual assault victim dragging her peers GPA's down one open, honest discussion at a time? Talk about an unnecessary inconvenience! One day your just having a couple grain alcohol cocktails together and the next your roommate is trying to talk about the personal problems that have her on the verge of making your room a single? Who does this girl think she is? Doesn't she know that college is for binge drinking and efficiency cramming? There's no time to learn about how shitty the world can be outside of the classroom. People go to school to become smarter, not become more well rounded individuals that better relate to others with unique, sometimes traumatizing experiences. Last time I checked accepting that life is full of a bunch of awful shit that has very real consequences wasn't on the syllabus, so why should Kat's floormates have to fit it into their all-too-crowded itinerary?
Plus, everyone knows that the ONLY way to cure the depression induced by non-consensual sex is by talking to a school psychologist that is a relative stranger for at least the first few visits. What help could a nurturing, understanding friend provide in a situation like that? Why do you think 'Third Eye Blind' "wished" that the person would step back from that ledge? Obviously because actually doing something about it would have been futile. Northern Michigan is a community, and the best type of neighbor is one who leaves you the fuck alone. I certainly hope Kat doesn't forget that, because we wouldn't want the Dean Of Students to be forced into suspending her after graciously letting her stay in school and giving her oh-so-many opportunities to regain her mental health.
P.S. Maybe the most cold-blooded "take care" ever thoughtlessly thrown into a signature. This letter basically reads...
Hold all your dark, potentially fatal feelings inside except for when you're in scheduled visits with the practitioner of my choosing.
Try not to die,
Here's the thing about losing 27-0 to a third string quarterback when you literally couldn't ask for circumstances to be working more in your favor. You have to take your lumps after. That's why Bill O'Brien trying to tell journalists what their job is rather than tucking his dick between his legs and throwing himself at the mercy of the court felt strange. It's also why you don't delete a team posted poll - complete with emojis - predicting how you're going to score you're first touchdown after you not only get shutout, but only cross midfield ONCE. The Texans deserved to be publicly shaming after a performance that made watching Team USA disrespect the entire country seem intriguing.
Now granted - due to this brand new, little known smart phone feature called the screenshot - they are getting roasted anyway, but it's bullshit that they thought could get away burn-free after an effort that should have gotten them all burned at the stake. I'm flat-out offended that the Houston Texans twitter team thought they could sanitize themselves of scrutiny after their employer wasted 3+ hours of my life running the ball on 3rd and long. I'm sure they were disappointed after having such blind faith that their offense - led by someone who's apparently about as accurate as the quarterback pay scale - would score.......at all. However, we were all disappointed that we sat through that dumpster fire and we should have been able to easily pour gasoline on it by simply clicking retweet.