Barry Bonds Knows God Would Vote For Him To Get Into The 'Hall Of Fame'

LBS- “God knows I’m a Hall of Famer,” Bonds said via ESPN’s Mark Saxon at a Saturday press conference where Bonds formally spoke to the media for the first time as the hitting coach of the Marlins.

“I know that I’m a Hall of Fame player,” Bonds continued. “I don’t really need to get into that. I’ll leave that to you guys to make that determination. That’s not my fraternity.

“But in my fraternity, in Major League Baseball, there’s not one player that ever could sit there and say that I’m not one. There’s not a coach who ever coached me that says I’m not one.”



You hear that baseball purists? It doesn't matter what you guys think. Much like Tupac Shakur, only God can judge Barry Bonds. I suppose the only flaw in that line of thinking is that we can't be sure of God's thoughts on PED's, but I have reason to believe he's a much bigger supporter of the Old Testament of the MLB rulebook. You know, the good old days when the only commandment was to hit the ball as far as you can as often as you can by any means necessary? If God was smart enough to create the world in six days then he has to be smart enough to know that baseball was more enjoyable when dudes were sticking needles in their ass and hitting the ball 550 feet. I bet the Lord loved the Barry Bonds era. If he hadn't already rose from it he would probably be rolling around in his grave as we speak knowing that Barry Bonds isn't in the HOF. It's a shame we lost him just a few thousand years too soon or he would be able to voice his opinion on the matter. He could have convinced some of those angels from the outfield to come speak on behalf of steroid use too. I'm sure a little bit of manufactured strength would have lightened their workload as well.

Whatever, so maybe Barry Bonds is never going to be honored in Cooperstown, but at least he knows that he has a spot reserved for him in that illustrious Hall Of Fame in the sky. Everything happens for a reason. Barry Bonds not being immortalized in baseball history is all a part of God's plan. And even if it's not, just let Barry think that it is, because the only role that God still serves in society -other than apparently being an unofficial member of the 'Baseball Writer's Asssociation'- is taking the blame for every non-optimal situation in a person's life.