And on the extensive list of things that separates you, I, or any other weekend warrior from the top golfers in all the world, we have a new difference atop the leaderboard. Unfortunately for those, much like myself, that pride themselves on drinking just enough to vehemently blame the booze, a complete inability to judge just about every factor that might contribute to the flight pattern of a ball has officially been pushed into second place. It's replacement as the most stark contrast between the lives of pros and joes is, somewhat surprisingly, not having a goddamn search party at our disposal when said ball happens to land wherever the wind might take it. For a quick second, I almost considered that scene to be the most relatable moment in U.S. Open history, seeing as I misplace more shots than I take (an unusual amount of) pride in. However, the truth of the matter is that Tiger Woods and Co. just looked for Dustin Johnson's ball more diligently than I have ever looked for one of my own. Like, that's a thirty second clip and if it were taken of me in the same circumstance I would have crammed in 4-6 aimless whacks at the brush, a dejected endeavor back into a rapidly depleting sleeve of balls, and a generous underhand toss that fell about 15 yards up the fairway but not far enough onto it that I'd have to explain myself to anyone. To be honest, if I actually found out where half my tee shots ended up then I'd probably just crack beers in the clubhouse instead, but for that 15-second span in which I'm actually determined to find my ball it would be nice to have around 30 people matching that intensity.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Categories
All
Archives
January 2020
|