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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Brandon Browner Has Addressed His Penalty Issue By Wearing Boxing Gloves In Practice

11/12/2015

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ESPN- Browner, who has been terse with the media at times this season, seemed to make a point of sitting at his locker and inviting all questions on Monday. He even fielded several questions about his league-high totals of 17 penalties called and 15 accepted -- which he declined to discuss last week.

"I've been dealing with this. This is not new to me. I've led the league the past couple seasons," said Browner, who indeed led the NFL in penalties from 2011-2014 even before he signed with the Saints. He had 48 called and 40 accepted during his first four years with the Seattle Seahawks and New England Patriots.

Browner said he has tried to make a "conscious effort" to cut down on his penalties, and he said he has worn boxing mitts in practice along with other Saints defensive backs this year to cut down on the grabbing tendencies -- something he had also tried in New England last year.



​Practice? Practice?! What exactly is the protocol in regards to him wearing a pair of Everlast's during the game? I'm dead serious, I think the Saints need to get him a black and gold pair of boxing gloves and see what the league has to say about it. If that's illegal then get him a pair of oven mitts. If that's illegal then make him clench his hands into fists and duck tape them like that. If that's illegal, and I know this sounds harsh, but cut his motherfucking fingers off. Maybe just leave the pinkies and thumbs out of pity. The guy is making enough undeserved money from the Saints franchise to justify amputation, and I don't even think it's debatable. At this point there is not a single measure that is too extreme. 

Honestly, it's gotten to the point where I would rather Browner get smoked for a touchdown then to see him get another penalty. I have endured years upon years of conditioning to accept it when the Saints secondary gets torched. What I don't have is the ability to keep watching the ball fall incomplete and having to wait for the inevitable flag being thrown in Browner's direction. The 5 seconds after an incomplete pass against the Saints is like that feeling you get when you see the phone ringing knowing it's your doctor with the results of your STD test. I can only imagine it's the exact same feeling a women in her early 20's gets after she pees on a stick. Watching Browner get burned for a touchdown is disheartening, but watching him get, yet another, holding or pass interference penalty is goddamn demoralizing. Having him take the field looking like Muhammad Ali may be incredibly embarrassing, but I would rather he get caught floating like a butterfly than have to endure the sting of another yellow flag landing at his feet. He's like a 13 year old boy that just started going through puberty, he is not to be trusted with his hands. 
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