Ok, ok. Enough is enough. Joke's over. We've had our laughs, so can we please get Zion Williamson out of high school before he legitimately hurts someone? Billy with the buzzcut ain't getting a full ride off his ability to absorb a basketball to the face, so it's kind of important he doesn't get dunked into early onset dementia before taking the SAT's.
In the same vein that it's extremely difficult to practice wrestling moves on your little brother without underestimating your own strength and tombstoning him into Tomorrowland, it's damn near impossible for the future Dukie to showcase his full range of athletic freak without risking his opponent's ability to ride a bicycle without training wheels. The more cautiously you play the more likely you are to get put into a dangerous spot by your own hesitancy, and - by the looks of all the all highlights I've seen - Zion Williamson is mostly playing against stone frozen sophomores who are one more jump scare away from soiling themselves. He's a bull in a china shop, if the most fragile item in that china shop was the self esteem of self conscious high school students.
Can't we just expedite him to college already? Of course I enjoy watching windmills over entire graduating classes, but the Wu-Tang Clan has taught me too damn much for me to fail in suggesting we do it for the children...