First and foremost - and I think I say this in every blog that references Metta World Peace - the fact that we let Ron Artest come to be known as Metta World Peace is nothing short of ridiculous. Just absolutely asinine that I'm just supposed to forget everything that has taken place during Ron Artest's ...uhhh...."illustrious" career, and start calling him by some unrealistic global goal that is most often pleaded for by women that are standing on stage caked in makeup trying to prove that there is more to them than a pretty face. I don't think I will ever get over the juxtaposition of the person in question with his current legal name, nor do I think I should be forced to - to be honest.
Even more inexplicable than one of the most volatile players that professional sports has ever seen transforming himself into some unofficial spokesperson for universal pacifism is said player using a sailing reference to somehow defend one of the most indefensible contacts in NBA history. The fact that Metta World Peace had almost no idea what he was talking about and he still managed to make (something that mildly resembled) sense of paying a player that was nothing more than a staple in a championship team's bench SEVENTEEN million dollars a year is the most stunning display of idiot savantcy I have ever heard. A ship without an anchor has a higher risk of getting lost at sea, and a bad basketball team without an overpaid, mediocre 7 footer is at higher risk of accidentally gaining momentum and progressing in any way, shape, or form.
Okay fine, now that I have drawn out the comparison it doesn't seem to be all that logical, but Ron Artest's having a rudimentary knowledge of boats is potentially the upset of the century. He had me convinced that Timofey Mozgov's 64 million dollar contract was a wise financial commitment for about half a second, and - somehow - that's half a second better than any explanation that has come from the Lakers front office.