Dustin Johnson Played In A Pro-Am Wearing His Soon-To-Be Father-In-Law's Hockey Jersey Yesterday7/26/2018
Just another added bonus of being 'The Great One', I suppose. Even in the most copacetic of relationships, I'd say that wearing the last name of your soon-to-be father-in-law on your back in the public eye gives him the upper-hand in the unspoken power struggle that typically exists between a daughter's dad and her fiancee/husband. In this case, however, said daughter is the product of such exceptional sperm that even one of the most gifted golfers in the world has thrown in the towel on trying to be the most universally important person in her life. I don't blame Dustin Johnson, as the father to his soon-to-be supermodel bride is basically synonymous with the entire sport of hockey to those that don't even know the rules of it. Wayne Gretzky is essentially the Canadian Tiger Woods had Tiger Woods not gotten the dominance beaten out of him with his own club after screwing the entire wait staff at every pedestrian chain restaurant within walking distance. Therefore, DJ really had no choice but to except that his celebrity will always come in second, if not third (as Paulina still goes by 'Gretzky'), during holidays. That said, he deserves credit to embracing his eternally silver medal. A lesser man might continue to fight that uphill battle out of foolish and stubborn pride, but - if his decision to rock the illustrious number 99 on the links is any indication - then Dustin Johnson is keepin' it a 100 in regards to how retired his place will be in the family power rankings. The fact that he's living a better life than 99.9% of the population sure makes it easier to do so, but there are far too many people of his notoriety that would rather come off as a self-important prick than lean into being lesser in status than even .1% of their peers. Especially if they had to pass one of those peers the mashed potatoes on Thanksgiving,
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