GQ Magazine Just Lost All It's Credibility By Naming This Vegan Slop The 'World's Best Burger'

Metro- A burger in New York City has just been named the best in the world – and it doesn’t even contain any meat. 

We know. It’s mindblowing.

​The famous $6 (£4) Superiority Burger, which has a fully vegan patty, has just been named the best the world has to offer by GQ magazine.


Wasn't it just last week that the whole world was discussing whether or not a hot dog was a sandwich? The argument for it being that it is meat between bread, and the argument against it, the correct argument, being that a hot dog is simply a hot dog. Well, how come no one talks about how the use of the word "burger" gets frivolously tossed about? We have turkey burgers, chicken burgers, salmon burgers, tofu burgers, vegan burgers, yet none of them are really burgers at all. Exactly what definition of "burger" are we working under, because it sounds looser than Kim Kardashian's...uhh...maternity clothing. If everything is a burger, what the fuck is a sandwich? We have people calling a hot dog a sandwich, but a piece of chicken between two slices of bread is a burger, and NOT a sandwich? Why is a patty made out of anything on a round roll a burger? I have to say, I completely disagree with that premise. Burgers consist of ground beef, and if you have made a conscious decision to stop eating meat then congratulations on your healthy lifestyle, but fuck you, you don't get to call your sandwich a burger. 

People have been raving about the taste and texture of the chunky nutty burger but no one knows exactly what’s in it – just that no cows were harmed in its making.

​Chunky? Nutty? Excuse me while I force my breakfast back down. No consistency? A bunch of nuts and berries jammed together with some healthy paste that's sure to run-through my body faster than the 6 beers I am going to need to keep it down? Never mind the fact that it looks like some animal's fecal matter. Honestly, if it was named 'the deer shit burger' I wouldn't even question it. That's the exact opposite of what a burger should be. This is just a classic vegan move. Yet another effort for the meat hating public to convince us that we are living wrong. It's not enough that they have sworn off red meat, they can't sleep until everyone has sworn off red meat. Their stupid plant burger can't just be good, it has to be THE BEST. Well I, for one, am offended. Not just because someone had the gall to call a bunch of shit that you find laying around your backyard a burger, but because this publication is misleading their meat loving public. There simply isn't anything more un-American than that.