I Thought I Was Done Discussing The Matt Barnes/Derek Fisher Story, And Then Gilbert Arenas Roped Me Back In
Damn you Gilbert, I wanted so badly to be done with this story! Where have you been all this time when this was actually relevant? I know you were busy publicly marginalizing female athletes and sharing your date raping tips, but you mean to tell me you couldn't take time away from counting your unearned money to to share your side of the tale until now? No wonder why you had to call WNBA players "bean pies" before you got any publicity. Your timing is anything but topical.
I think I just made the conscious decision to start taking Gilbert Arenas word as gospel. Not because it's even close to the truth, but because it makes life way more entertaining. Like this picture he just painted, for instance, is probably a huge dramatization of what actually happened, but it makes the whole scenario so much funnier to me that I am just going to accept it as fact. It's probably more of a second hand account, but the mental image of Derek Fisher frantically running around a mansion while Matt Barnes chases him and his bodyguard stands in the front lawn calling 911 instead of actually protecting him is too perfect to ever let leave my mind. I know that the angrier person is always the more dangerous person in a physical altercation, but still not a good look for D-Fish to take off running and screaming like a Chinese person in the original 'Godzilla' movie to avoid fighting for his (their?) woman. It was one thing when Matt Barnes declared himself the winner, but now that we have it from multiple sources -no matter how unreliable- that Derek Fisher is kind of a bitch it makes total sense that even his own players won't take his side. Sorry Derek, I know I am likely basing this off the exaggerations of a complete lunatic, but now that I am a certified believer in Gilbert Arenas I am forced to think less of you. Nothing personal.