And there you have it. A representation of America so beautiful that amber waves of grain should be photoshopped into the background and it should be mass produced and marked up in the name of capitalism. As if the National Anthem didn't provide enough patriotism to induce international puking, the presence of both baseball and a bald eagle basically shoved their red, white, and blue fingers down the throat of anyone that loathes the United States' self love. If posters are still a thing that get put up in the year 2018 then slap the image of James Paxton calmly standing tall in the direction of the stars and stripes with a bird of prey perched atop his shoulder on one and hang it up in the bedroom of every baseball fan from sea to shining sea. In all seriousness, good on the Seattle pitcher for keeping his cool as talons narrowly evaded the tendons in his non-pitching shoulder. I don't know how I would have reacted if I were in his position, but it probably would have been similar to trying to kill a spider with a flame thrower in that it would surely be in an overly dramatic fashion that caused far more damage than necessary. Bearing the facial expression of a grown man with shit in his pants wouldn't have made for nearly as Kodak a moment, nor would the blood staining the jersey of an idiot trying to outrun the grip of a claw full of lawn darts.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Categories
All
Archives
January 2020
|