In True Jim Harbaugh Fashion, The Michigan Coach Apparently Dissuades His Players From Eating Chicken Due To Its Character Flaws

Harbaugh is insane □□
(Via @BleacherReport) pic.twitter.com/0HMFlOES8P

— RedditCFB (@RedditCFB) July 30, 2018

It really speaks volumes about the coach in question that I did not need 100% assurance from the person that was basically told that "eating your feelings" means taking on the personality of your poultry to know that dietary advice wasn't given in jest. Jim Harbaugh strikes me as a guy whose hilarity is in a lack of intent only, so thinking that the FDA has conspired to withhold "nervousness" from the nutritional facts of chicken is not anywhere close to being as intricate a leg pull as it was a psychotic strong arming. Funny nonetheless, but any laughs had at the suggestion that the anxiety of a dead bird is contagious through the ingestion of it's breast were ironically had out of awkward angst. 

Jim Harbaugh might be the most egregious example of someone who wouldn't be able to function in a football-less society, but if you still needed a reminder that seeking a profession organizing the violence that takes place on the gridiron requires a loose screw then look no further than this "coaching tip". The cabin fever one might take on by spending 18 hours a day in an office configuring x's with o's might have something to do with a head football coach's clinical insanity, but the predisposition to that type of crazy doesn't exactly lead down too many successful career paths. 

Thinking that you actually are what you eat is worthy of a chuckle when it's coming from someone who makes millions on the sidelines, but if that workplace weren't afforded to him than it would be probably be worthy of nothing more than a pity penny for a panhandler on the sidewalk. Let's put it this way, if CTE ever ends football as we know it, every 'Where Are They Now?' of a late-middle aged white dude that devoted his adult life to teaching the sport is going to leave the audience thinking he was the one bashing his skull for every centimeter on Saturday's and Sunday's. It shouldn't come as a surprise that what flies on the field doesn't exactly fall in line with common sense, but there's not a more shocking indication of that then the mental image of a well-respected football coach giving his protein a psychological evaluation prior to grilling it...even if I'd love to get his thoughts on the clutch gene of cows.