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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Iowa's Faith Ekakitie Was Stopped By Cops After Being Misidentified As A Bank Robber While Playing Pokemon GO

7/24/2016

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​So wait, let me get the details straight. White cop, innocent black suspect? Guns drawn, but none fired? Everyone's alive? African American in question doesn't feel persecuted? Police in question don't feel like their ability to execute their job was compromised? Whew, what a relief. It would have been a real shame if we had to pick sides between black lives and blue lives, and weren't given the opportunity to see the inherent, topical humor in a college football player getting misidentified as a bank robber while playing Pokemon GO. If this had gone slightly worse, or the parties involved were  even slightly less understanding then we wouldn't be blessed with the freedom to soak in a story that's so comically representative of 2016 that it might as well have been plucked straight out of a half year review in 'The Onion'. Finally - amidst all the racial unrest and seemingly weekly terrorist attacks - a fucking reason to laugh. Even the most headstrong of social justice warriors can't consider this prejudice. The most avid defenders of all members of law enforcement are at a complete loss for words trying to wrap their mind around the concept that sometimes completely innocent minorities do get stopped because of how they look. It's the perfect narrative. Other than the media - that has earned every ounce of misdirected blame - there is literally no one to point fingers at!

It's not the cop's fault. They had every right to approach Faith Ekakitie when he was frantically wandering around a park by himself cloaked in all black in the heat of the summer with a backpack flung over his shoulders and fucking goggles atop his head. Who would have thought that the questionable life (and wardrobe) choices that led to him chasing around virtual Pikachus would have had him matching the description of an unprepared bank robber desperately looking for the quickest path to safety? The fact of the matter is that they did, yet no one is prematurely deceased, no one feels disrespected, and NO ONE can get even mildly upset about a situation that was nothing more than a understandable misunderstanding! And just when I thought I would always be disappointed to hear that a Pokemon related incident had a happy ending...
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