Normally I would steer clear of criticizing a high school kid whose selfish brand of basketball is aided by a completely compliant head coach, but this is the same high school kid that got his ass powdered on social media for putting up 92 points in what remains the biggest disgrace to the game I have ever seen. I guess what I am saying is that when you achieve viral glory by being an insufferable asshole, I stop factoring age into the all-too-important equation of whether or not I deem you a worthy target. That's why LaMelo Ball is the only hardly pubescent high schooler I feel comfortable taking aim at when he costs his team full of enablers a chance at a state championship with a stat line that makes Kobe's farewell tour look efficient. I don't even know how to top failing to make a shot from 2-point range, but I would argue that bricking TWENTY 3's in a 32 minute game (plus overtime) is just futile enough to do so. I mean, that effort was so garbage that I looked over the box score and almost didn't even notice that his brother went 9-32 and was just as responsible for Chino Hills getting the fate that their shockingly stupid, kin-centric offensive execution deserved. Maybe I'm being too harsh, but if I have to see this kid make the internet rounds when he calls his shot from half court then you bet your ass I'm going to call him a fuck boy when he misses that same shot 15 times over in a playoff game his team lost by a single possession. Anyway, let's check in with the level headed patriarch of the Ball family to see what he has to say...
Right. Well, you can count me all the way out on every one of these kids. Don't get me wrong, I will love nothing more than to watch them make J.R. Smith, Swaggy P, and Dion Waiters look down to Earth by comparison. Once this trio of chuckers gets to the league they will be nothing short of must watch entertainment, but I as far as rooting for them goes? Thanks, but no thanks. As far as I am concerned, they can all strong-arm their way onto the Lakers, because I can't think of a better franchise to flounder in mediocrity while encouraging fundamentally flawed hero ball of the highest order. I don't mean to sound like Oscar Robertson or Charles Barkley because I love The Steph Curry Show just as much as everyone else, but the LaMelo Ball's of the sports world give the retired curmudgeons a legitimate voice. The numbers don't lie, and a 15 year old whose father plans on fixing the NBA Draft for every one of his three kids bested the NBA record for attempted 3's by SIX in a much, much shorter game.
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