While a bunch of overeager hockey fans wouldn't be my preferred company when offering the rest of my mortality to another human being, I can't help but feel extremely happy for these two lovestruck Devils' diehards. I just have one question. Was having Miles Wood, of all people, deliver a puck that says "Tracy, will you marry me?" to your soulmate really the most promising way to get her to agree to eternal monogamy? I mean, look at this fucking guy... Kid's got a jawline that appears to have been chiseled from granite in the mold of Ashton Kutcher's, eyes you could lost in, and a smile that's only made more seductive by the fact that it's not even remotely meant to be. I thought you're supposed to limit the risk of the proposition during a marriage proposal? This dude is lucky the maintenance crew didn't need to be called to remove his long time girlfriend from the leg of a 22 year old speedster whose play leads me to believe he might be willing to do a little grinding off the ice as well. I don't even mean this as a low-blow towards her now fiancé because you can probably count on one hand the amount of people in the world that aren't comparatively made to look like gremlins by the mere presence of James Franco's long-lost-inside-a-gym brother. It's a good thing this guy knew the love was true, because if Tracy had cold feet about her current situation they would have been hot on the tail of Miles Wood. Shit, I might jump the fence and kick down the door of the closet if I knew he was inside, never mind receiving a souvenir proposal that didn't have a 'From:' attached. Congrats to the happy couple. I'm sure they overcame a lot throughout their relationship, but nothing was more of a test than the split second in which Tracy thought she had caught the alluring eyes of her favorite team's heartbreaker. Thankfully they passed!
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