Go ahead, laugh at Marlon Humphrey. He undoubtedly deserves to be the butt of more than a few jokes. After all, he's a professional football player that got locked up for stealing a $15 phone charger - that was as useful to him as the power cord for a VCR - from a person who had his personal information saved in the app he used to hail him in the first place. As long as you weren't the star-crossed chauffeur who received a notification that some dude named Marlon was waiting four minutes up the road on the right hand side, thinking about this entire scenario playing out is pretty goddamn hilarious. However, just know that while you clown him, you've likely walked a drunk mile in his stumbling, bumbling shoes before. Hopefully you haven't blown your chance at a female-dominated 4-some by threatening assault on an Uber driver in the process of stealing property that you could have inconspicuously plucked from literally any outlet in the frat house you just left, but you probably have "borrowed" someone else's phone charger at some point. Whether it be accidental or intentional, from friend or foe, as provisional or permanent, phone chargers just have a weird way of changing hands when alcohol is involved. Now, usually those hands don't belong to two strangers that are desperately playing tug-of-war with them through an open car door, so I guess I'm far more sympathetic to his predicament than his impromptu and inebriated non-solution. Still, those fingers might get a little sticky if you're getting ready for a night on the town and the electronic life-blood in that bar is slowly trickling down. As sad as it may be, maintaining your spot on the grid is like the modern day survival of the fittest. P.S. I'd certainly hope it was a misunderstanding. Jacking a charger you understand that you can't use is just mean spirited...
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1/27/2018 01:04:58 pm
That was a pretty cheap stunt pulled by a professional footballer who definitely earns more than that Uber Driver. you being doesn't justify you stealing from others. he was rightfully sent to jail. 15$ or 1$ a robbery is a robbery.
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