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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Roger Goodell Is Apparently Loosening Up On TD Celebrations, But I'm Fearful Of Where He Plans On Tightening Up

5/23/2017

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Roger Goodell is expected to tell NFL owners group celebrations, using ball as prop after TDs, going to ground, snow angels are now allowed.

— Tom Pelissero (@TomPelissero) May 23, 2017

I can't believe I am going to say this, but this news concerns me. Of course I'm on board with all the over-the-top celebrations and appreciate that they will no longer be met with flying yellow flags that can impact the actual game, but the last person that us fans should want a favor from is Roger Goodell.

Think about the few times you have taken the opportunity to stop being a narcissistic asshole and actually committed yourself to doing even the smallest of good deeds. Doesn't engaging in common courtesy feel way better than it should for far too long simply because of how rarely you do it? Don't you use your generosity/hospitality/kindness to justify future instances in which you aren't as quick to be a nice person? Now imagine that phenomenon taking hold of the most stubborn, out-of-touch mind in professional sports. 

All Roger Goodell did was allow players to express themselves in jubilation, but - considering how often he does right by his viewers - he's probably going to use that minor, obvious adjustment to rationalize about 10 other rule changes that counteract the interests of his consumers. I wouldn't be mildly surprised if we don't even get to see the undisciplined dance recitals because the commissioner of the NFL sold that airtime as ad space. We are talking about a person that's so blind, deaf, and dumb to society that he believes marijuana is more addictive than the pain killers his employees legally use to manage potentially life-altering injuries. If there's a son of a bitch that would give an inch just to try to distract half-drunk football fans with celebratory, premeditated prop comedy as he took a mile then it would be him. He might be loosening up that tie as a show of good faith, but - make no mistake - his ass his just as tight as ever.
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