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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Round Of Applause For The Man That Stole His Ex-GF's Disability Check To Fund His Penis Enlargement

7/6/2016

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Metro-  A mother claims that her violent ex-boyfriend spent £5,000 of her disability benefits on a penis enlargement operation.

The woman, identified only as Vanessa, says that former plumber Daniel Maxwell intimidated her into handing control over her finances, including the money she received in benefits for her bipolar disorder.

Vanessa, 34, said that as she struggled to feed her children, Maxwell used £5,000 to have two inches added to his penis.

‘Daniel insisted on changing my bank details so that the payments went straight into his account,’ she said.

‘He booked a penis enlargement operation and put down £1000 of my money as a deposit. He said he would need regular £100 top-ups after the op.’




Disability check? For a bi-polar disorder? Since when is the ability to to be two different people a handicap? Sounds like a goddamn superpower to me. I'd love to switch it up and stop being my true self from time to time - even I didn't have 
total control over when that happened. Doesn't this lady know that more is always better? She basically slapped God in the face. She was given the gift of TWO personalities, and tried to exchange it for money?!? Could you be more ungrateful? This wasn't  an ugly sweater from your grandmother hunny, this was the blessing of being capable of the entire range of emotions at a moment's notice and you tried to trade it in for financial gain. How dare you?!

I'm not saying that the funds were better spent on her manipulative ex-boyfriend's dick endowment, but did she ever think that maybe - just maybe - he was trying to win the intended recipient back by growing a cock that could please both her crazy asses? Why can't it be possible that Daniel actually enjoyed dating two women in one body at the same damn time? That's like having the least threatening side chick in the world. He probably only took the money so she couldn't waste it on medicine that would turn her into a monotonous, predictable significant other. Shit, sounds to me like this guy was desperately trying to piece together a broken relationship, and we are going to sit here and drag his name through the dirt? Have we no shame? I, for one, stand with Daniel Maxwell, his newly huge hog, and his incessant need to be kept on his toes.

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