JHNews- According to a probable cause affidavit obtained by the Jackson Hole News&Guide this afternoon, Ryen Russillo was found naked in a stranger’s condo around 3:30 a.m. Wednesday.
Officers were called to a condo in the 500 block of Snow King Loop for a report of a “highly intoxicated male who was refusing to leave.”
“Officers found the defendant, later identified as Ryen August Russillo, lying on the bed in the south bedroom naked except for his pants around his ankles,” the probable cause affidavit states.
A condo resident told police he heard someone come in and assumed it was a family member but a few moments later Russillo walked in the bedroom with his pants half down.
“He was obviously intoxicated and the only thing he said was that he was getting his stuff,” records state.
Tough break for Ryen Russillo. I suppose he only has himself to blame for getting so incoherently drunk that he "decided" to saunter into someone else's dwelling in his birthday suit. However, if there were state where you might be able to get away with doing some criminal shit while unclothed and intoxicated then it absolutely has to be Wyoming.
Granted, I have never visited before, but something tells me (probably the fact that the apartment he walked into was clearly unlocked) it's one of those flyover states whose residential landscape makes it extremely difficult to truly inconvenience others. I guess I have never put all that much thought into it until now, but any place that sounds like a decent spot to start up a meth business seems like a pretty good place to drunkenly hobble around with your pants around your ankles free of prosecution.
It's sort of like a "tree falls in the forest" situation: If an ESPN radio host blacks out and pulls out his penis while in the Great Plains but no one is around to see it, did it even happen? Obviously someone did see it and therefore it did happen, but that's only because - I would imagine - Ryen Russillo was staying at the only condo complex in a 100 mile radius. The only benefit to vacationing in Wyoming is not having to deal with all that many other people, but - unfortunately for The Worldwide Leader's resident meathead - the drunken brain will always find the nearest bed...regardless of who it belongs to.