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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Taylor Hall Is Out With A Lower Body Injury, And I Don't Feel Feelings Anymore

11/15/2016

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Devils says Taylor Hall (lower body) is out tonight at Dallas.

— Andrew Gross (@AGrossRecord) November 15, 2016

Taylor Hall is a lower body injury.

— Andrew Gross (@AGrossRecord) November 15, 2016

Hynes said, at this point, Taylor Hall (lower body) out for "precautionary reasons." Will be examined again later today w/update later

— Andrew Gross (@AGrossRecord) November 15, 2016

Precautionary? PRECAUTIONARY!?! What do you mean precautionary? Hey Coach Hynes, why don't you take proper precaution so that my optimism doesn't end up on the long term IR? If you're so worried about the long term health of those invested in the franchise then how come bottles of prescription pills weren't overnight delivered to the doorsteps of season ticket holders who were brought to the brink of a panic attack by hearing this obscure ass news? I know it's only been 14 games, but I don't even know what this team looks like without Taylor Hall anymore. I guess I never expected him to play in all 82 games, but - I got to be honest - I was really looking forward to being pleasantly surprised.

Now I'm stuck wondering if a couple of points against the Sabres gave Adam Henrique and Kyle Palmieri the boost they need to re-take the reigns of an offense that has since been transformed into something that doesn't require the excessive, heart compromising intake of caffeine? I don't like this. I don't like this at all. A lower body injury? That's a Lou Lamoriello-esque level of uncertainty that I'm simply not prepared to handle heading into an all-important road trip. If the word's "status quo" even think about slipping from John Hynes' lips I'll be on the first flight out to Dallas to formulate my own second opinion on the condition of the fastest legs in the league that don't belong to Connor McDavid. How dare he hit me with this indefinite bullshit during a 4 game winning streak. If Cory Schneider wasn't starting in net I would have already been arrested for trying to massage the most important thighs in the Devils locker room back to full strength before puck drop. Precautionary, HA! What does he think this is, some type of long season that requires even the most well-conditioned athletes to sit one out and heal their bumps and bruises for the good of the long haul? Fucking unbelievable. 
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