The World's Most Depressing Gender Reveal, Starring Gordon Hayward And His Otherwise Female Family7/10/2018
Disappointment. Disbelief. Devastation. If you took all three of those depressing emotions, mixed them together, and seasoned them with far more salt than necessary then you'd have the strong dose of reality that Gordon Hayward was forced into choking down on video. From the very moment the sun shone off that first ball of helium it was awkwardly obvious that the Celtics' small forward resented its color. From the feigned enthusiasm of the initial reaction, to the balloon punt, to the cynical sarcasm of "daddy's alwaaays happy", the only ways in which Gordon Hayward could have made it more clear that he was hoping for a boy would have made that clip too explicit for a professional athlete (or his wife) to post on the internet. I think it bears mentioning that we are talking about a guy that somehow managed to maintain most of his likability in throwing up the deuces to a small market team in NBA free agency. He knows what to say to appease the masses, and yet he was so outward in his inability to grin and bear that his wife had to question his level of excitement before the 30 second gender reveal reached it's conclusion. I legit think that, for at least a split second, he would have been more enthused to see a rabid animal poke its head of that box if only to keep alive his faith in finally fathering a son. That's how badly Gordon Hayward wants just one other boy in the house, and it would be nice if fate would intervene before he ends up raising an entire sisterhood as a starting five in hopes of continuing his basketball legacy.
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