Source- Don Thomas is a longtime regular at the Hooters in Roswell.
But it's not the beer or the chicken wings that bring him back. Instead, it's the generosity of one of the waitresses. "Mariana had only been here a short time," Thomas said. "I just barely knew her when she made the offer." "I said, 'Well I have two kidneys, do you want one of mine?'" said Mariana Villarreal, a waitress at Hooters. "My reply was, 'I will accept it,'" Don said. Mariana doesn't know Don outside of work. But she feels a higher calling. Her grandmother recently passed away from kidney failure. I think most males realize that as soon as they step foot in to a 'Breasturant', as the sexually inhibited feminists like to call them, we are pretty much labeled as perverts. Not like the 'taping a mirror to your shoe' level of pervert, but like the regular amount of pervert. Pervert on a novice level, if you will. I know that, you know that and Don Thomas knows that. That's why he has taken it to the next level. If you going to be viewed as such there's no downside to going back on a regular basis. Sure, the Hooters regular might be viewed as bit creepy, but if everyone else is thirsty than the females will probably flock to the table that has the drink order they know best. Perverts need friends too. Why not go back and be the sounding board for a waitress that spends all day getting hit on? You know how some guys befriend girls in hopes of playing the long game. Maybe the girl is seeing someone else, and the guy is just waiting out the inevitable breakup? This is the sickly old man version of that. While the desperate 20-somethings are trying to sneak out of the friend zone and into some drawers, Don Thomas is just looking for a new kidney. Pretty genius if you ask me. There's no downside to being the nice old man in the corner table, but who knew it could save your life? Everyone and their mother knows why Donnie boy keeps going back to Hooters. Sure the beer is cold and wings are tasty, but age is nothing but a number. No man outgrows the joy experienced by gazing upon some supple bosoms. When Mr. Thomas says he goes back for "the generosity of the waitress" we all know he is talking about her generous display of cleavage. Turns out Mariana turned that line of BS into a self fulfilling prophecy when she decided to offer up an organ. When they said that healthy sex drives are key to a longer life I don't think this is what they were talking about, but I'll be damned if it isn't just as efficient. That's the happiest a Hooters waitress has ever made someone...
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