A HS Football Coach Was Put On Administrative Leave After A Video Surfaced Of Him Punching A Player As A Form Of Discipline
YardBarker- A high school football coach has found himself in hot water and could be facing criminal charges after a video surfaced that showed him punching one of his players in the stomach.
According to Tony Shin of NBC 4 in Los Angeles, Beaumont High School football coach Will Martin has been placed on administrative leave after an anonymous parent released the footage. The parent says Martin disciplines players by making them close their eyes, put their hands above their heads and take a punch from him in the gut.
The parent who released the video says he or she was told Martin has done the same thing to dozens of players. Beaumont Unified School District has turned the footage over to police for investigation of potential criminal charges.
Some players have defended the coach, with one parent saying she believes people are overreacting to the punch.
“If it’s so bad, why are the kids laughing? Why are the kids thinking it’s funny?” Jessica Taylor, whose son plays for Martin, told NBC4. “I don’t see a problem with it. My son says there are drills where you get hit like that, and my son says, ‘Mom, it’s football.'”
I don't mean to be a wet blanket because I do think the culture of a sports' locker room can breed some traditions that the general public couldn't possibly understand. That said, I think we are going to have to abide by a pretty common rule of thumb here and declare that it's never a good idea to hit high schoolers whose health you've been entrusted with. Judging by the uproarious laughter, a vast majority of the team seems cool with the punishment by torso punch treatment, but - when you're technically using your authority to assault teenagers - all it takes is one uncomfortable kid and the camera lens on his cell phone to get you canned.
Simply out, for every Mrs. Taylor that raised her son to have a strong core and a tough attitude there's going to be a Mrs. Anonymous that raised her son to have a weak spine and a loud mouth. That's why it's probably better to not deliver half-hearted uppercuts to the midsections of semi-developed children. I don't think it's worthy of criminal charges considering the context provided by the video, but it's definitely worthy of a county-wide search for a new, less controversial football coach. When the best excuse that can be made on your behalf is "if it's so bad, then why are the kids laughing?" then it's safe to say you're putting yourself at too much risk, because the collective moral compass of teenage boys who may or may not be succumbing to peer pressure is a pretty juvenile last line of defense. Not trying to be the fun police, but - if job security was my concern - I think would err on the side of disciplinary wind sprints as opposed to blows to the ribcage of defenseless receivers.
In The Most Bills Mafia Move Ever, A Woman Got Caught Trying To Steal a Ketchup Dispenser From The Stadium
I have never actually seen the movie 'A Beautiful Mind' so I can't speak to the entirety of the plot. I would imagine it's about some sort of transcendent genius, and not a degenerate kleptomaniac with the strongest of affinities for condiments. I just wonder if the same could be said if it was filmed at 'Ralph Wilson Stadium' instead of MIT.
You see, this woman - for all her flaws - is special. She might not be special in the way that translates in professional accolades or financial gain, but she's damn sure special in a way that's representative of an entire city and it's masochistic football fanbase. Every Bills' fan that watched this lady snatch up a ketchup dispenser with her sticky, tomato paste fingers was in awe of the audacity that it takes to attempt such a feat, and surprising the people of Buffalo with your depravity is no small task. Putting it all on the line in an effort to attain the rarest of kitchen appliances might seem like a completed lopsided risk/reward. However, it's a risk/reward that served as proof to her peers - who spent the morning building up the beer muscles required to launch yourself through a flaming table - that this member of Bills Mafia has Godfather-esque qualities.
The Miami Dolphins O-Line Coach Sent A Video Of Him Doing Coke To A Stripper, And -Shockingly - It Has Surfaced
Some might say that a grown ass man whose job was made easier by the selection of a blue chip prospect who fell in the draft due to the untimely release of a clip of him inhaling marijuana faster than a firefighter at a grow house should know better. Some might even say it's common sense not to send an indisputable video of yourself running more lines than Al Pacino in the filming of 'Scarface' to the stripper that you have apparently been cheating on your wife with.
Unfortunately, those people just don't realize how easy it is for an emotional man to act irrationally once he's already started his downhill slalom through some fresh white. Chris Foerster may appear to be a reckless asshole who - for one extremely misguided reason or another - thought his job as an NFL offensive line coach made him as untouchable in Miami as Tony Montana. In reality, he's just the degenerate equivalent of a lovesick teen desperately ingesting his pride after (literally) putting it all on the table in order to win back the provider of his hired sexual services. It's actually pretty romantic if you're able to ignore the narcotics, infidelity, and high probability of prostitution. After all, I'm sure even a hopeless addict has standards when it comes to the type of properly reimbursed pussy he'll lick excess drug remnants from.
In all seriousness, we can end this "troubled individual" narrative that I just heard Adam Schefter refer to on ESPN. Sure, an NFL position coach who was looking for love in a laughably hopeless place and powdering his nasal cavity while on the clock has himself a goddamn grab bag of personal problems. There's no doubt that Chris Foerster was literally living the 'Vice City' lifestyle since he was presumably able to sit without suspicion through a meeting with the pupils the size of quarters. If you can duplicate your version of "normal" in the workplace after taking an 8-ball to the face then you must norrrrmally be pretty fucking high in the workplace.
That said, someone like....oh, let's say...his own (soon-to-be former) player Laremy Tunsil didn't receive any fucking sympathy and all he did was piss off his stepfather after creatively smoking a little weed in college. If you find yourself making one single excuse for this moron, or blaming the sex worker that posted a private video publicly then just know that you're partly responsible for enabling the double standards that ultimately got it released. If this was truly only intended as some sort of response to racial inequality then it was a hell of a lot more unorthodox than taking a knee, but I'll be damned if the "aww, let's get the poor guy some help" reaction doesn't highlight the hypocrisy throughout the hierarchy in NFL organizations. So yeah, send his ass to rehab because he obviously needs it, but don't tell me I shouldn't expect better out of him than I do out of the kids he's tasked with coaching up...
Former NHLer Jiri Hudler Allegedly Threatened To Kill A Flight Attendant That Wouldn't Bring Him Cocaine On An International Flight
ClickOnDetroit- Jiri Hudler is accused of threatening a flight attendant while demanding cocaine on his way from New York to Prague, according to a Czech newspaper report.
According to the report, the 33-year-old former Detroit Red Wings forward told the flight attendant he wanted cocaine. When she told him that would be illegal, Hudler allegedly threatened the woman and told her he would have his friends kill her when they arrived in Prague.
Moreover, the flight staff accused Hudler of doing cocaine in the airplane bathroom and said he tried to urinate on a food cart.
In a statement to Blesk magazine, Hudler denies the accusations.
Oh please, are we really going to act like requesting that an airline servant fetch you recreational narcotics while 30,000 feet in the air en route to the Czech Republic is a rare occurrence? You heard the lady. She said it was "illegal", not impossible. Seems like more of a "technically still in US territory" issue more than anything else. I mean, if booger sugar wasn't one of available seasonings then she failed to make an extremely important distinction to a former professional athlete whose uncanny acceleration on the ice is starting to make a hell of a lot more sense.
Now granted, threatening to have her murdered by your local cronies because she was unable to provide a "fix" to your drug dilemma is a bit excessive when the destination in question makes that potential "hit" more intimidating than any check that Jiri Hudler has ever thrown. The type of guy who openly expects cocaine to be delivered to him on a silver mirror while undergoing the inherent inconvenience of overseas travel is not the type to be treated facetiously, so I understand her level of concern. However, before we go chastising someone whose outrageous demand really makes you wonder what kind of...::sniff, sniff::...amenities the NHL was providing him, let's take a second to focus on the more important issue at hand...
Who in the hell forgot to board the blow?!?!
I feel like everyone is piling on Jiri Hudler and assuming that the high maintenance demon up his nostril is the same one responsible for the damningly downward spiral of a former 30 goal scorer's career. Pretty presumptuous if you ask me. Maybe we should just wait and see if there's any validity to this oddly specific story. And even if there is, the hypocrites might want to hop off their high horse like they have never responded to an unscratched itch by promising homicide and/or relieving themselves on a food cart while stuck in isolation with hundreds of strangers miles above solid ground.
Friendly reminder: The Lady Byng Trophy is awarded to the player that exemplifies sportsmanship, gentlemanly conduct, and a high standard of playing ability on the ice, not necessarily in the air...
A Pennsylvania Fire Chief Called Mike Tomlin The N-Word On FaceBook, But - Don't Worry - He Apologized
And this is how you know the entire message has become completely bastardized by the minds of those that disagree with it. There's no chance in hell Chief Paul Smith realizes that in saving his position with nothing more than a Chappelle-esque "sorry, I...I...didn't know I couldn't do that" and a nonsensical disclaimer about him being on vacation after using a racial slur on thee most public of platform he basically exercised the same white privilege that Colin Kaepernick initially sat in protest of...
Seriously, if there anything more caucasian than slamming the enter key on an N-bomb on Facebook, and then turning around and being like "yeaaaaah, so that was my bad"?
Oddly enough, it would actually be a lesser case of the dangerously fatal institutional racism that instigated the protests if he just doubled down on his "yes, I said it" with a "and I gosh darned meant it". What he actually did was give a bullshit apology in exchange for a prejudice pass in a profession that requires him to save people regardless of their skin color. If that's not an undeniable example of the ACTUAL problem that has become an afterthought in the petty pining over what constitutes true patriotism then I don't know what the fuck is.
We are going to continue bitching about the proper way to conduct oneself in the presence of a flag and a song while Chief Bigoty Bill is out there making a list of "no good n*ggers" whose lives might literally end up in his hands at some point. Think about that.
Just what youth sports needs. A couple strong male role models...letting their frustrations with each other result in the type of sloppy, awkward wrestling match that you'd expect to see near the bathroom of a dive bar right around last call. I don't what initially caused the argument that led to one grown man trying to choke the life out of another grown man, but I have to imagine it was something super important...like a disagreement over what situational play was less likely to get completely botched by absent-minded 8 year olds.
Seriously though, how weird would it be for me to say that I can kind of understand how something like this might come to pass? I'm not excusing the two adults that made complete asses out of themselves in front of other men, women, and children in broad day light, but you have to be pretty passionate about football to want to coach it. I'm sure that passion results in aggravation when you're trying to get little brats to stop running around as aimlessly as those magnetic pieces in the old school electric football game.
Sure, it's asininely immature to get violent in front of those that have sponge-like brains that are supposed to be learning from you, but - relatively speaking - it's more acceptable than publicly berating a 3rd grader for cutting off his route short of the sticks. Considering society's uptick in ADD, I can't fathom the patience it takes to teach kids their blocking assignments, so I'm just glad that Buddy Stephen's potential protege decided to ring the neck of someone who is of age.
I...I...I...just can't tell you why, but I find this photoshop incredibly intriguing. It's obviously ill-advised and surely at least mildly offensive to the nation that had it's prominent female monarch defaced on behalf of online fan engagement, but intriguing nonetheless. Maybe it's the attention to detail required to include the red raven eye or maybe it's the bird's unbelievably smug smirk caused by the schnoz of a 91 year old woman, but - regardless of it's level of appropriateness - that photoshop is nothing short of mesmerizing.
Now, I don't know what kind of "recreationally enhanced" thought process led a social media manager to 'Microsoft Paint' a purple bird across the face of anaristocrat that is basically the personification of nobility, but something tells me that this is proof positive that England isn't ready for it's own football team. There are probably a bunch of Londonites perturbed that their city is opening up it's stadium doors to an organization that - if only for a couple of seconds - valued retweets over royalty, and to be true NFL city you have to embrace even the most shamelessly American aspects of it's fandom.
It's a real "if you can't accept us at our worst then you don't deserve us at our best" situation, if you ask me. Granted, the version of "our best" that they get annually get treated to usually involves the Jacksonville Jaguars so I suppose I can understand their irritability, but the United Kingdom is going to have to have to let a hell of a lot more unbridled obnoxiousness slide if they want to have an NFL team all to themselves one day.
Change– Buster Bronco is an icon. A fun loving WMU goofball. At the sidelines of a football or basketball game, or out in the community, Buster is Kalamazoo’s favorite mascot. But Western Michigan University has changed him, “updated” him to be more lean and athletic. In the process, we’ve lost the very heart and soul of who Buster is. What is wrong with the Buster we’ve had? He’s classic and has a unique look for the university that’s been around for years.
Let’s bring the Buster we know and love back.
Fight on fight on for Buster!
Change for the sake of...well...change, what could possibly go wrong!?! Honestly, I find it fairly amazing that sports organizations - whether they be professional or collegiate - almost exclusively find a way to screw up decisions that don't even need to be made in the first place. It's like they don't realize the sentimental value of tradition or the age old, fool proof concept of leaving well enough alone. If it's not broke then don't fix it, and a fairly dumpy horse named Buster that calls a college campus home was most definitely not in need of a lifestyle makeover.
Obviously it's a non-story that WMU changed their mascot from a potentially stoned Bronco who is as lovable as he is dopey to some high horse, fratty douchebag who cares too much about his appearance. I just can't seem to figure out why they even thought that dosing their mascot with HGH would be met with praise in the first place? I swear, it's like the people whose job it is to relate to fans don't realize that those fans spend the average school night taking years off their life. Why would they want to wake up at 6AM on a Saturday in order to binge drink until they can't see straight just to stumble inside the stadium and get body shamed by a vascular horse who came straight from working out at the stables in a jersey that's two sizes too small for him?
They should bring back the original Buster. Not only because he's relatable to the people he engages with, but because the new Buster is try hard asshole that didn't have the common courtesy to wait until after graduation to better himself. Plus, I'd rather have a mascot that's looking for munchies than one that's prone to mood swings.
The Lions Fan That Posted A Racist SnapChat Of Two People Who Were Seated During The National Anthem Has Had His Tickets Revoked
DetroitNews- The Detroit Lions have taken swift and decisive action against a season-ticket holder who posted a racially charged video on social media directed at a pair of fans who sat through the national anthem prior to last Sunday’s game at Ford Field.
After an investigation, including a conversation with the person who posted the video, he has forfeited his season tickets.
The video, posted on Snapchat, had a voiced-over suggestion that the sitting fans leave the country. The photo was captioned “stupid (expletive).”
Team president Rod Wood told The Detroit News he would be reaching out to the fans who were captured in the social-media post.
Now, THAT is how you do it, and by "it" I do not mean properly salute the American flag. Nope, by "it" I actually mean shed light on just how ridiculous it is that some people think that completing the most minuscule motor skill of standing up on cue inherently makes you a "better" American.
I'm not sure the troops have come to a consensus on how they feel about peaceful protests during the National Anthem. I do, however, think an overwhelming majority would agree that turning your back to the stars and stripes to shame strangers (and yourself, really) with racial slurs on social media while failing to pay attention to the song you are standing for in the first place is decidedly not a way to show respect for the military.
Just think about this for a second. While the ramparts were gallantly streaming this jackass was fiddling with his fucking cell phone, and (apparently) thought that doing so on two feet put him on enough of a moral high ground to avoid the collateral damage of dropping an N-bomb in a public forum. Never mind the immediate hypocrisy of the caption "ignorant n*ggers", because - if his actions are any indication - even he would tell you that's an offense that's secondary to the unAmerican act of taking your eyes off the flag while it's music plays. Ya know, just like he did to SnapChat his own goddamn stupidity while giving proof through the night that his rage was completely illogical.
Good on the Detroit Lions for forever sending this guy back to his couch where he will undoubtedly be too bloated to remove himself from cushions when the 'National Anthem' starts playing through his television. Here's to hoping he stays there forever.
The Braves Accidentally Played 'Rock You Like A Hurricane' During Their Series Against The Miami Marlins
Imagine hearing the song 'Rock You Like A Hurricane' at a baseball game and automatically believing that some sadistic, second rate "DJ" was tucked away in the annals of the stadium maniacally laughing while making light of the natural disaster that is barreling towards the home town of the visiting team. Like, you really got to be desperately looking for controversy to assume that some dude making minimum wage to press a button is creating inappropriate, opponent-specific playlists.
Could it be that a popular oldie just happened to be up next in the rotation that almost definitely doesn't get filtered pregame, since - ya know - what are the odds that a catchy, common tune is going to remind the Marlins that if the Braves don't crush them then a tropical cyclone of epic proportions just might?
Nope, absolutely not. Definitely some behind-the-scenes dickhead with a twisted sense of humor and too much time on his hands. Only possible way an awkward, untimely reference could be made by way of a universally overused pump-up song. In fact, I bet 'The Scorpions' were the only 80's rock group to use a super over-over-top metaphor to describe careless, casual sex. Since that's more than likely the case, there's simply no way the Braves' half-asleep music technician could have ended up on the ass end of such unfortunate irony without being a tone deaf jerk. It's a shame his employer is too much of a coward to admit that...
A NJ High School Made 75 Students Take Piss Tests After A Beer Can Was Found On The Premises At A Football Game
NBC- Parents of students at a New Jersey high school were ordered to get their children’s blood and urine tested after a can of beer was discovered at a football game.
The can of beer reportedly landed on the ground and was spotted by a school official during a game at Randolph High School on Friday night.
It’s unclear if the can was thrown or fell, but it came from bleachers filled with students, according to a letter from Randolph Superintendent Jennifer Fano, who said some of the students appeared drunk and that several additional opened containers of alcohol were later discovered.
After the can of beer was found, about 75 students who were in the bleachers were taken to classrooms as school officials contacted parents so they could pick them up. Each student was given a form — a rule-out test — requiring blood and urine samples.
Parents were given two hours to get to health facilities in Morristown, Dover and Denville so their children could be screened. The students faced suspension from school if they didn’t complete the screening.
Superintendent Fano released a follow-up letter Wednesday, in which she apologized to the parents and kids who were inconvenienced by going to the emergency rooms for screenings. But she said she stands by the decision of staff to carry out the procedure at the game.
Fano also said social media video later surfaced showing kids drinking at pregame parties, a video that has since been turned over to police.
"Teenage drug and alcohol abuse is a national epidemic and Randolph is certainly not exempt from the problem. I am hopeful that Friday’s events will serve as an important learning experience for all of us," she said in the letter.
Teenagers consuming alcohol at a football game on a Friday night? WHY, I NEVER!!!
But seriously though, at what point do you think school administrators realized that demanding 75 students get hauled off to nearby hospitals to pee in cups was a laughable overreaction to finding one beer can? Was it when they had the hallways looking like a 2nd grade fire drill, or when they kicked off to the deafening silence of the 6 people left in the stands?
I'm not letting the kids off the hook here. Any self respecting under-ager would have had their vodka in a water bottle and made sure it stayed out of the sight lines of their supervision. Still, stopping a game to disperse the entirety of the student section to medical centers like you were trying to find a Patient Zero for relatively harmless teenage binge drinking is easily overbearing enough to make the students look like the victims.
Not only that, but are teachers aware that the 16 year olds of today are as familiar with substance abuse as the 21 year olds of 2002? Shit, at least beer can be measured in empty cans. Pretty sure the same can't be said for the goddamn heroine epidemic. Honestly, I only see two outcomes that result from this active quarantine of mildly buzzed brats. Either no student ever is coming to a Randolph football game every again, or they are showing up stoned out of their gourds. There's only one type of kid that watches the entirety of a high school football game they aren't participating in sober, and he views it from the sideline as part of the third string.
So, since the alternative is the use of recreational substances that can't be tracked via the trash, maybe a couple swigs out of a tainted 'Gatorade' isn't worthy of sending the entire student body to the ER for something that's more of a certainty than an emergency. Especially since the parents who were wildly inconvenienced probably considered it a blessing that all their kid did was steal from their liquor cabinet.
Now that, my friends, is the right way to handle being an authority figure. I hadn't the slightest clue who Jerry Falwell was before watching him rile his students into a frenzy, but I can now say that I am absolutely certain that he knows a golden opportunity when he sees one. Turning what was - statistically speaking - a once in a lifetime victory into a chance to earn the goodwill of his students by gifting them a holiday is a pretty smart move....
Doing so on a day that is already technically a holiday? Well, considering those that he's pandering to currently have higher BAC's than GPA's, that's goddamned ingenious. We can (and should) talk about how satisfying it is that a school named 'Liberty' embarrassed a program whose years of relative success actually came at the expense of true liberty. However, I think we should also discuss how their president (who is not-so-surprisingly butt buddies with the actual president) helped his university live up to it's namesake by convincing a bunch of drunken idiots that something that is right for most is a privilege for them. Jerry Falwell just became the educational equivalent of a player's coach, and he did so by taking the same day off as 90% of the working world with his students being (literally and figuratively) none the wiser.
I just wonder how many unscheduled rounds of 18 he managed to fit in by not-so-transparently playing the role of the cool guy?
Executive 1: “It’s not something we discussed, so to talk about reasoning, we’re talking hypotheticals. … Certainly he’s good enough to be a backup. … But we have a good No. 2, a guy that fits our system that we have familiarity with. He’s here for the same reason that [Dolphins coach] Adam Gase goes back to [Jay] Cutler. We know exactly what we’re going to get from the guy. Physically, Kaepernick’s more talented, but familiarity with a backup at that position, knowing exactly what you’re going to get, is more important than the ‘wow’ factor. … It’s like with [Robert Griffin III]; you had him playing a certain way, and he was a hell of a player. But as soon as defenses figured out what they were, and a specific way to play them, that’s where they had to be able to start to win from the pocket. If you can’t do that in this league, it’s tough.”
Executive 2: “From our end, it never got down to [going to the owner]. To me, the protests, all that, it wasn’t even a factor for us. It was the ability to fit within our offense. He doesn’t throw the ball great, he’s more of an on-the-move, zone-read type of quarterback. He needs to be in a specific system. For us, it was a system thing. What he does well is totally outside what most teams do. And so here’s my question: I understand the Kaepernick deal, why it’s news, but nobody’s talking about RG3? I know since it’s Kaepernick, it’s what sells, but the problem that RG3 has getting a job is the same as Kaepernick for a lot of teams.”
Executive 3: “I don’t like the guy as a player. I don’t think he can play. I didn’t think he could play at Reno, I don’t think he can play now. … You don’t think if he was a good player, 20 teams would be lining up? … He’s inaccurate, inconsistent reading defenses. He needs everything to be perfect around him, and he needs to run a certain offense. When he was rolling, they had an unbelievable defense and a great running game with an amazing offensive line. Everything was perfect. And you consider that, why isn’t there a debate about RG3? He just wasn’t a consideration.”
Honestly, I'm shocked it took us until now to hear this one. After all, the best way to prove something isn't remotely racially motivated is to argue that all black, mobile quarterbacks are basically exactly the same. Never mind stats. Forget injury history. Context and circumstances are irrelevant when adopting the the polar opposite of the "You white? You Ben Affleck" approach to justifying the unemployment of a guy that had a 4:1 touchdown to interception ratio for a team that primarily employed skill position players that belong in the CFL. Colin Kaepernick decided to take a knee on behalf of the rights of an entire race while RG3 is probably afraid to take a knee out of fear that he might fracture it, but you can deny that they are both fast, African American quarterbacks and thus comparable by every significant metric other than on-field performance and resume.
Now admittedly, one has quietly handled becoming the target of a divided nation of football fans with class while the other couldn't get regulated to a backup role without getting pouty and punting footballs to himself on the practice field. Unfortunately, having a wildly superior level of leadership capabilities and mental toughness doesn't matter as much as having an shared inclination to play outside the pocket.
In all seriousness, score one for the "he's being blackballed" brigade. I have heard one single person make mention of RG-fucking-3's immature ass, and then all the sudden THREE different executives mention when while being interviewed for the same damn article? I don't think that all NFL owners are in some secret group text spitballing rationalizations, but this distinct line of parallel thinking is the type of thing that might appear out of absolutely nowhere if they were. Something to think about.
A Coach In The Legends (Lingerie) Football League Verbally Lambasted His Team At Halftime, While They Were Up By 14
BustedCoverage- The Seattle Mist pounded the LA Temptation 28-13 last week to win the LFL’s Western Conference Championship and advance to the Legends Cup, but don’t let that score fool you — it wasn’t all fun and games out there. Not when Seattle hothead head coach Chris Michaelson is around dropping F bombs and demanding perfection.
His Mist were up 20-6 at half, but you wouldn’t know it after watching the guy berate his team for not looking for the ball on offense and burying the QB. It’s become quite the apparent the guy only has one gear...
After giving myself a second to process a rage-fueled tirade that appeared to be a projection of Chris Michaelson's personal problems at home or in his actual workplace, I must say that I don't find this remotely surprising. Sure, there were some times throughout that long winded diatribe - that went position by position in chastising the entirety of a roster that was currently up by multiple touchdowns - in which I wondered what he was so fucking mad about...
...Then I realized that he probably likes it better when his team is losing. You think a lunatic that is that passionate about football wants to be coaching a group of girls in booty shorts? All due respect to the proud members of the 'LFL' that could probably put me in a shock-induced coma with nothing more than a cold shoulder, but they can't possibly believe that the man who appears to be testing the limits of his heart is happy to be there. Chris Michaelson shows up to that "stadium" in front of tens-of-tens of fans every week just looking for a reason to get pissed off.
Down 14? Up 14? What's the difference? The head coach of the Seattle Mist is going to find some sort of justification - no matter how illogical - to vent the frustrations that he has with own inability to work in a league whose popularity isn't more closely tied to a bare midriff than Ezekiel Elliott's. Of course he has no qualms with essentially telling his team to go fuck themselves when they are halfway to the Legends Cup. He'd sell that cup to the nearest pawn shop if it afforded him the chance to coach at a level competitive enough to condone him telling his players to make sure their opponent is forced to stop mid-game to hold a funeral service.
The Royals GM Addressed Danny Duffy's DUI By...Talking About How Porn Could Be Baseball's Downfall...I Think?
TMZ- The Royals exec was talking to the media about pitcher Danny Duffy's DUI -- when he was asked if there were "educational protocols" in place to help keep other players out of trouble.
That's when Moore revealed team programs to educate players about the dangers of drugs, alcohol and porn.
"We talk about pornography and the effects of what that does to the minds of players and the distractions ... And how that leads to abuse of -- domestic abuse -- to abuse of women."
Moore said the team also discusses how porn impacts relationships.
Moore says the goal is to help his players become better people -- husbands, brothers, teammates.
I guess that settles that. Here I was thinking that baseball's entertainment value was being neutered by old, repressed white men and their antiquated, overly traditionalist values, and...well...according to Dayton Moore I have actually never been more right about anything in my entire fucking life. In fact, this level of accuracy is so foreign to me that I can't even remember the twists and turns we took down the path that led from drinking and driving to jerking off and beating your wife.
Is the Royals GM some sort of evil genius that managed to make a connection so goddamned absurd that we instantly forgot that Danny Duffy's drunk ass fell asleep waiting for some french fries? Is he literally so clogged up with cum that he can't answer a laughably unrelated question without referring to the porn that he encourages his players to also avoid at all costs? I don't know what the hell the goal of that answer was, but I genuinely think we should be concerned about the safety of Dayton Moore's loved ones if he truly believes that emptying the tank is the root cause of spousal abuse.
I felt like I was sitting around the poker table listening to Steve Carell's character describe a boob as a bag of sand while trying to wrap my brain around that response. Is it possible that the 50 year old General Manager of a professional baseball team has never enlisted some professional help while rubbing one out? If he has, does the result not immediately clear his head of everything but a little harmless self loathing? Has the clubhouse really been brainwashed by this asinine line of thinking? Could I have snapped the Kansas City Royals out of their 43 inning scoreless streak days ago if I just quickly flashed see POV assplay up on their projection screen? What's a horse shoe? What does a horse shoe do? Are there any horse socks? Is anybody listening to me?!? Ahhhh, I have so many questions!!!
I guess if I were to sum it up with one I would ask if the whole point of that press conference was to get me to ask myself all the other ones while completely ignoring that one of Dayton Moore's starting pitchers was so inebriated behind the wheel that he couldn't drive-thru something that is literally built for convenience? If not, then what exactly was the point of comparing the actual dangers of mind-altering substance abuse to the fictitious dangers of using visual aides for mind-clearing genital abuse?
I may not have any of those answers, but I did come away from what oddly became a public condemnation of technologically enhanced masturbation with a slightly better understanding of something. And that is the underlying inhibitions that ultimately encourage grown men to hurl dangerous projectiles at the heads of other grown men when they exude even the tiniest bit of arousal or excitement on the baseball diamond.
Art Briles Was Hired By The Hamilton Tiger-Cats Of The CFL...Annnd Promptly Canned Less Than 12 Hours Later
Let that ten hour tenure serve as a lesson to the Hamilton Tiger-Cats and any other football team that considers hiring a disgraced coach that enabled a criminal culture of violence, rape, and general lawlessness on a university campus. That lesson is: If you're too corrupt for college football in the South then you are literally too corrupt for any type of employment in sports.
I don't know why a CFL team thought that a name that has become synonymous with widespread sexual misconduct would be a wise addition to the club. If the question is "how did a semi-professional organization find themselves blindsided by the type of unbearable backlash one should OBVIOUSLY expect after hiring Satan himself?" then your guess at an answer is as good as mine.
That said, hopefully the instant tidal wave of criticism that ended Art Briles' tenure in Hamilton before the ink even dried on a contract that might as well have been a deal with the devil will turn off other moronic franchises from overlooking a resume of group rape just to add a little more firepower to their offense. I can't definitively say we will never see Art Briles on another sideline, because...well...I'm incapable of erasing the unforgivable aspects of sports' history that make the following tweet possible. I can, however, say it's a lot less likely after a team (unfortunately not all-that-shockingly) said "well, maybe..." and was met with a collective "ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND?!?".
The Texas Rangers Refused To Switch Home Series With The Houston Astros While Their City Was Underwater
I completely understand the idea of not doing other organizations any favors in a business as cutthroat as professional sports, but I think it can be universally agreed upon that this is taking that concept above and beyond social acceptability. Ultimately, it falls on the league to relocate around natural disasters, but trying to leverage another MLB President for three of his home games when his city is under the sea is as heartless and cold blooded as it gets. Playing off a defense of your own revenue as a defense of your fans' financial commitments is just disgustingly disingenuous. Especially when you consider that every Rangers' fan with a soul would have gladly changed around their schedule to show up to games played one month earlier - when their team was still technically (albeit barely) in contention, mind you - if it meant doing a solid for a struggling neighboring city that was dealing with a hell of a lot more than being 15 games back in the division.
At the end of the day, it's not the Texas Rangers' professional responsibility to sacrifice even one single ticket sale, but - since it's quite obviously their moral responsibility - they probably should have known that they were going to end up looking like cruel, insensitive dickheads by refusing to do so. When you poo-poo the idea of undergoing a minor inconvenience on behalf of those undergoing a major catastrophe then you deserve every ounce of backlash that comes your way.
Simply agreeing to switch series would have been the easiest positive PR that an organization has ever received, and instead they intentionally pitted themselves against the most sympathetic of parties by claiming "unfairness" in the face of a drowning region that's too distraught and destroyed to give a shit about a first pitch. They temporarily switched the focus of a tragedy that took lives, families, friends, and/or homes to fucking baseball, and the Texas Rangers are shocked that people are pissed off and responding emotionally?
A Couple HS Cheerleading Coaches Are On Administrative Leave For This Video That Shows Them Forcing Girls Into Splits
GlobalNews- Cheerleading coaches and school administrators in a Colorado district have been placed on leave, and Denver police are investigating amid a series of videos showing high school cheerleaders screaming in pain while being pushed into splits during practice.
KUSA-TV reports the videos show eight cheerleaders at Denver’s East High School repeatedly being pushed into splits while their arms are held up by teammates. In one video, a girl identified as freshman cheerleader Ally Wakefield, sobs in pain and repeatedly asks her coach to stop.
“Please stop! Please stop! Please stop!” she is heard pleading with her coach in the video, which was allegedly shot at the start of cheerleading camp last June. KUSA says the videos were shot on the phones of two team members and were sent anonymously to the station.
Wakefield says she didn’t expect to be “forced” to do elevated splits, forced down by her coach and fellow cheerleaders. “[The coach] was pushing like with his other knee on my back to try and keep my posture straight,” Wakefield told KUSA. “It was tearing my ligaments and my muscle at the same time.”
“This is a grown man pushing my 13-year-old girl so hard against her will while she’s crying and screaming for him to stop that he’s ripping tissues in her body,” Ally Wakefield’s mother, Kristen Wakefield, said. “I don’t understand why this man is still employed there.”
I have a question, and shockingly it's not "how did this grown man not come to the conclusion that he was doing someone wrong as he forcibly placed his hands on 13 year old girl in a physical manner while she screamed for him to stop?". Granted, that's a pretty important one to ask of the (now former) high school coach that took his job to mold the young cheerleaders of tomorrow far too literally. I mean, I feel like this one is just too obvious to consider an oversight. Training is one thing, but instructing a group of kids to follow your lead by pushing and pulling at the limbs of a teenage in an effort to contort her into a more effective cheerleader is quite another.
Nevertheless, what I really want to know is, isn't this what tryouts are for? I can understand expecting your whole squad to be able to do a split, but maybe - just maybe - it makes more sense to cut the girls who can't? Call me crazy, but that seems much easier - and far less illegal - than recreating a scene that absolutely had to take place in an episode of 'Criminal Minds'. I could be way off base here, but I feel like you don't necessarily need to be able to touch your crotch to the hardwood to vocally support the bums on the JV team. Certainly Ally could have better honed her flexibility for her sophomore season by making arm letters next to trolls that wouldn't even split a calzone to get moved up to varsity.
Long story short, if the bodies of young athletes were as malleable as their minds then I'm pretty sure that youth basketball teams would have started grabbing their mildly overweight small forwards from both ends in hopes of stretching some skill into the power forward spot. I don't want to discourage high school coaches from pushing kids past their comfort zone, but I also don't think that high school cheerleading practice should sound like it's taking place in a dungeon basement. Not to cut this coach off at the knees that he has buried in this girl's back, but if the kid you're looking after sounds like a Sandusky victim then you're probably overstepping your bounds as someone in a position of authority.
A 77 Year Old Grandma Was Assaulted By Her Daughter And Granddaughter For Listening To Her Steelers Too Loudly
TheComeback- According to the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, the woman in question was allegedly beaten over two days by her daughter and granddaughter because she was listening to the Pittsburgh Steelers’ preseason game too loudly on TV and the radio Sunday.
Delores M. Amorino, 40, Sarah M. Amorino, 17, have reportedly been charged with aggravated assault, criminal conspiracy, strangulation, terroristic threats, false imprisonment, simple assault, harassment and criminal mischief. They are being held on $200,000 bond. The grandmother’s injuries were not life-threatening.
The details of this story are pretty insane.
Per the Tribune-Review, the hearing-impaired older woman locked herself in her bedroom with a radio after her daughter and granddaughter turned down the volume of the TV. Delores and Sarah Amorino then allegedly broke the door to the older woman’s room, hit her in the face with a broom, twisted her arm, whacked her in the back of the head, stomped on her foot, shaved her head with scissors and a shaver, choked her with their hands, wrapped a scarf around their neck and refused to let her leave the house. The abuse lasted from Sunday through Monday, until she escaped Tuesday morning.
I'm of the belief that you can't truly call yourself a family unless you possess at least a little bit of disfunction, but breaking down Granny's door to give her unauthorized buzzcuts and put her in sleeper holds? My goodness. Even Jerry Springer would have a hard time pretending to help these lunatics resolve their differences while actually just turning them into shamelessly compelling television.
Look, if you want to be naive and think that the grandmother did nothing wrong then be my guest. As someone that has struggled through watching far too many out-of-town games in bars, I feel inclined to agree with anyone that does everything in their power to put some sound to the sights. I just also feel inclined to believe that a 77 year old woman that went and locked herself in her room away from her psychotic family wasn't just pushing buttons that said 'volume' when she turned up the decibels to a level which probably had the whole neighborhood thinking they were standing next to Mike Tomlin. The elderly are a very spiteful people (as anyone who has spent over 70 decades dealing with others should be), so there's no question this die-hard Steelers' fan tried to blow out some eardrums in retaliation.
That's not to say that I don't agree with her reasoning. That clearly hormonal 17 year old teen needed to be put in her place for thinking football is the same without commentary, even if that "place" was in an audiologist's office. That 40 year housewife needed to be reminded that Oprah's audience isn't the only thing that adds to a viewing experience, even if it made her ears ring louder than the 'Life Alert' her mother should have had around her neck before getting involved in a literal and figurative handicapped match. I totally agree with the point that Granny did too good of a job proving, but you have to know you've raised crazies that are capable of jumping the woman that ultimately brought them into this world before going out of your way to piss them off.
JHNews- According to a probable cause affidavit obtained by the Jackson Hole News&Guide this afternoon, Ryen Russillo was found naked in a stranger’s condo around 3:30 a.m. Wednesday.
Officers were called to a condo in the 500 block of Snow King Loop for a report of a “highly intoxicated male who was refusing to leave.”
“Officers found the defendant, later identified as Ryen August Russillo, lying on the bed in the south bedroom naked except for his pants around his ankles,” the probable cause affidavit states.
A condo resident told police he heard someone come in and assumed it was a family member but a few moments later Russillo walked in the bedroom with his pants half down.
“He was obviously intoxicated and the only thing he said was that he was getting his stuff,” records state.
Tough break for Ryen Russillo. I suppose he only has himself to blame for getting so incoherently drunk that he "decided" to saunter into someone else's dwelling in his birthday suit. However, if there were state where you might be able to get away with doing some criminal shit while unclothed and intoxicated then it absolutely has to be Wyoming.
Granted, I have never visited before, but something tells me (probably the fact that the apartment he walked into was clearly unlocked) it's one of those flyover states whose residential landscape makes it extremely difficult to truly inconvenience others. I guess I have never put all that much thought into it until now, but any place that sounds like a decent spot to start up a meth business seems like a pretty good place to drunkenly hobble around with your pants around your ankles free of prosecution.
It's sort of like a "tree falls in the forest" situation: If an ESPN radio host blacks out and pulls out his penis while in the Great Plains but no one is around to see it, did it even happen? Obviously someone did see it and therefore it did happen, but that's only because - I would imagine - Ryen Russillo was staying at the only condo complex in a 100 mile radius. The only benefit to vacationing in Wyoming is not having to deal with all that many other people, but - unfortunately for The Worldwide Leader's resident meathead - the drunken brain will always find the nearest bed...regardless of who it belongs to.