They did it. They actually did it. The New Jersey Devils - yes, the very same franchise that outsiders love to blindly dismiss as "boring" - did what was once considered unthinkable. The bucked the wisdom that seemed a little too conventional. They looked a prototypical two-way center up and down, and decided the future pro with the excessively punchable face and the brittle bone structure (that damning scouting part was brought to you by the insufferability of the city he now plays in) wasn't their type. They took a gamble on the highest of risers whose undeniably shorter resume did a better job jumping off the page. I was pretty sure that's exactly what they were going to do, but - somehow - it still seems surreal given their history.
The New Jersey Devils didn't just go with the more exciting, dynamic prospect, but they also managed to start fulfilling a creativity quota that was sorely lacking. When building a team the wise decision isn't always the one that's going to be more successful in having the fans at the edge of their seats, but it is when your team is painfully porous offensively that they are more likely to have their fans standing hopelessly at the edge of a cliff. Nolan Patrick might give New Jersey nightmares for the next decade, and Nico Hischier's game might end up having more holes than his homeland's most infamous diary product. That's the risk you take when picking between two players who were in a dead heat while turning the final corner. The reward - in this case - could be providing a blank canvas to a player who has the rare talent, endless drive, and room to grow into the most dangerous, versatile Swiss product since the army knife.
The kid just "loves to hockey" (as seen below in his charmingly broken English, not mine) and Devils fans should be chomping at the bit to love watching him love hockey because he is already electrifyingly good at most facets of it...
It's the road less traveled by this organization, and fans shouldn't hesitate to enjoy what should be a hell of ride...
Brian Windhorst Accidentally Updated His iPhone During The Draft, And I - For One - Feel Bad For Him
Look, there's plenty of reasons to poke fun at Brian Windhorst. For starters, the entirety of his successful career has become hinged on the tongue that he has firmly planted in LeBron James' tight little buttocks. You want to laugh at him for occasionally falling asleep on the air then have at it, but to criticize him for accidentally updating his phone during his version of the Super Bowl is disingenuous at best and undeniably hypocritical at worst.
Having fallen victim to an itchy texting finger when the pop-up that potentially serves as a temporary prison sentence to your ability to communicate, I refuse to do anything other than feel bad for the NBA insider who unintentionally locked himself outside during the NBA Draft. That mistake is one that is so easy to make that I swear it was the last joke that Steve Jobs left this world. I would honestly be surprised if he wasn't eternally laughing at every person anxiously staring at their screen after they frivolously smashed the wrong button to continue whatever meaningless, self absorbed narcissism they were partaking in at the time. Considering it's a "smart" phone that bar sure recalibrates rather slowly once it's time for a update, so I have no choice but to think someone is fucking with us from beyond the grave.
In all honesty though, this kind of slip-up is what separates the Brian Windhorst's of the world from the Adrian Wojnarowski's of the world. No way any true news-breaker is walking around without an 'Inspector Gadget' jacket full of WiFi-compatable devices when the game is on the line and time is of the essence. If anything, the fact that LeBron's personal consultant was one inflated thumb away from being off the grid is proof positive that being so closely linked with 'The King' allows him the professional wiggle room that his desk chair doesn't.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, I'm calling timeout. I'm absolutely here for the character assassination of the Chicago Bulls front office, because - after having flipped Jimmy Butler for a return that would make 'Home Alone 3' seem worth the wait - they deserve even the most harshly worded of criticisms. I just can't sit here and let the moral compass of the entire street pharmaceutical industry get dragged due South in an effort to comparatively make a dysfunctional organization look more incompetent. I don't exactly run with any drug runners, but I'm not sure I agree with the implication that it's impossible to conveniently get your fix without the fix being in. Travelle Gaines is in the inner circle of an NBA superstar so - despite being a personal trainer - he probably shouldn't be shedding light on his interactions with those pushing weight. That said, I find it much more egregious that he lumped them all together as a "profession" while hinting that they are anywhere near as terrible at doing their job tactfully as the jackasses that are making Michael Jordan happy to be a part of the Hornets.
In all seriousness, I think there might be some legitimacy to the claims of Travelle Gaines. In most cases I would just assume this was a little self preservation on behalf of a client that probably didn't mind being moved, but it's the person doing the preserving that has me rethinking that notion. We aren't talking about an agent or a business manager whose role is to maintain the reputation of a professional athlete. We are talking about his trainer whose role is to maintain the core strength of a professional athlete. You know you have truly fucked up as a franchise when you have indirectly offended a brick shithouse of a man into uncurling his kettle bells and loading up his Twitter fingers. When your gym supervisor starts worrying more about how your career will be defined than your abdominals you know the man who threw a wrench into how things were supposed to work deserves to have his nobility questioned. Especially when his defense of his shoddy hustle is reminiscent of that of a drug dealer...
Apparently Phil Jackson Kept Falling Asleep Courtside As A Potential Lottery Pick Worked Out For The Knicks
You know what, I find it pretty difficult to fault Phil Jackson here. Of course this alleged on-again, off-again snooze is fitting of the unrelenting executive incompetence/senility that he has displayed since arriving in New York. Sure, it could soon be joined by him stubbornly/stupidly undoing the one thing he's actually done right since taking over the Knicks front office (trading Kristaps Porzingis). However, if I were a 71 year old man with two fistfuls of championship rings to my name and very little incentive to turn around a broken franchise then I wouldn't bother staying awake to watch a 19 year old run up and down the court taking mildly contested jumpers either.
The real problem here isn't that Phil Jackson's old ass is slipping in and out of daytime comas when he's supposed to be intently studying the pros and cons of prospective players. The real problem is that a professional organization is still tasking him with doing so. What does that crazy, possibly hallucinating son of a bitch have to do to get fired? I'm pretty sure he's spent the last week combing the trade block while on 'shrooms. You want me to blame the guy who has been dancing on the clouds with the sugar plum fairies and shit for his continued employment?
This is on James Dolan. Phil Jackson has all-but-begged to get shit canned. So much so that now he's literally falling asleep on the job. At some point, the employer has to take responsibility for the massive, repetitive fuck ups of the employee. I think we past that point when Phil Jackson stepped to the mic and took a proverbial poop on the market value of Carmelo Anthony while in the midst of trying to trade him. Am I supposed to be surprised that the doddering dumbass needed a little shut eye? Sabotaging a sports franchise in a major market is exhausting work, and the guy who seems to be successfully doing so has basically been asking for someone to put his front office career to sleep for months now.
DrSaturday- Four-star 2018 defensive end recruit Tyreke Smith attended Ohio State’s one-day camp Saturday with an offer from the Buckeyes already in hand.
With little more to prove to the college football programs on the field — he has an offer from essentially every powerhouse in America — it was what he wore while participating that grabbed headlines.
“I decided to wear the shirt because I wanted to bring attention to the epidemic of blacks being killed at an alarming rate,” Tyreke told Ohio State site Eleven Warriors. “What we would like to do is have people talk about these issues to reduce the murder rate of African-Americans.”
“The shirt was created to bring light into the everyday problems that blacks face between police and black-on-black crimes,” Malik told Eleven Warriors. “The shirt exemplifies a voice that we have but may not be heard. So why not have people see it?
“We need to come together as a unit and stop coming after our own people,” he added. “We have to work together.” He also tweeted out support for his younger brother.
Tyreke pointed to “a lack of parenting, community policing and valuing education” as issues that surround crime, and he took time to thank his own family, coaches and teachers for their positive impact on him.
I don't really feel all that compelled to discuss - in detail - the actual message here. Regardless of how often you think fatal police interactions are racially motivated, I think we can all agree that African Americans definitely shouldn't have to aspire to stay alive despite their skin color. I can't possibly relate to how hopeless black people must feel as officer after officer has walked free of conviction - often with blood of their own firmly on the hands of those compensated to protect them. However, I can certainly understand why they feel threatened enough to promote a cause that seems to simply read as a plea for a human right as basic as equal treatment under the law. What Tyreke Smith said with his chest is an indisputable sign of the growing level of concern in his community, and it uses a little bit of shock value to paint a disheartening picture that every person should feel inclined to study as free from bias as possible.
That said, how about the balls on this kid to show up to Ohio State wearing that shirt? I know there are kids with varying levels of skill that these camps, but you have to be supremely confident that you'll be a sack machine at the next level to believe that you have "I can make a fairly aggressive racial statement before I'm enrolled and no one is going to say shit" talent. Let's put it this way...there are no two star linebackers that are still waiting on an offer showing up to a powerhouse program with what can unfortunately be considered a polarizing prayer for equality emboldened across their shirt. The message is powerful, but apparently so is the teenage messenger that knows he's easily good enough to get away with potentially stepping on some toes.
The New Jersey Devils Are Taking Cale Makar With The First Overall Pick, Says The NHL Authority That Is ESPN
Well, if I didn't know why ESPN fired their long tenured, incredibly reliable hockey staff before then I sure as shit do now. You can doubt the legitimacy of this completely uneducated guess, but you can't tell me that Pierre LeBrun or Scott Burnside would have went along with the company mission statement by trolling for clicks and/or subscriptions this shamelessly. I suppose as argument could be made for axing all of their actual NHL insiders due to a lack of financial incentive, but - if this mock(ery) of a draft is any indication - then the pursuit of spreading stupidity in hopes of picking up traction has to make the list of reasons why as well.
This shit stirring that's being (poorly) disguised as a knowledgable prediction stands a flat zero percent chance of coming to fruition. If the New Jersey Devils take Cale Makar they will no longer have the first overall pick, and if they have the first overall pick they aren't using it on Cale Makar. Those aren't opinions. They are facts. Though I tend to doubt that he will, the possibility that Ray Shero trades down absolutely exists. If he does get crazy then the highly touted defenseman with a wealth of offensive ability, a very generous/premature Erik Karlsson comparison working in his favor, and a whole hell of a lot of developing to do becomes an option. If not, one of either Nico Hischier (oh please, oh please, oh please) or Nolan Patrick will be manning the face-off dot for the Devils sooner rather than later. Corey Pronman may say otherwise, but any moderately trustworthy hockey writer wouldn't dare. Unfortunately, none of those are currently employed by ESPN.
P.S. Now that I am already bothered, it's time to get hot...
The Vegas Golden Knights Took Jon Merrill In The Expansion Draft, And Devils Fans (Semi-Unfairly) Rejoiced
In a strange, excessively fleeting way, I actually feel bad for Jon Merrill. I'm not going to pretend that I wasn't relieved to learn that he was Vegas' selection from the grab bag of barely mediocre misfits that the New Jersey Devils left unprotected. That said, those acting like the optimal scenario was to lose a young defensemen who unquestionably improved (though that is saying very, very little) throughout the course of a season in which he wasn't even in the 'Top 3' of blue line liabilities are simply stuck in the past. I'd be lying if I said my initial reaction to finding out the guy who spent his sophomore and junior seasons getting put on a leash and toe-dragged around his own zone on seemingly nightly walks was no longer with New Jersey was one of disappointment. However, I'm self aware enough to know that's not as much of an indictment of his late season performance as much as it is an indictment of how quickly my PTSD was triggered every time he touched the puck.
The truth of the matter is that Jon Merrill turned himself into a punching bag for pissed off fans (myself occasionally included) that would rather continue to beat the barely breathing horse no matter how many signs of life it started to show. In essence, he was the guy that gets caught cheating towards the beginning of the relationship and couldn't recover despite changing his ways for the better. Every little thing he did wrong in a Devils uniform was going to get eviscerated simply because it reminded people of the big things he used to do wrong on a regular basis.
For that reason, a separation was probably necessary. However, let's not go dancing in the streets because defenseless team lost a 25 year old who appeared to potentially be coming around. In no way am I saying that a decent third pairing defenseman (at best) was a foundational piece of the rebuild, but he is unquestionably a brick that now needs replacing. I'm glad that brick wasn't named Beau Bennett, but I would have been slightly happier if it had carried a $5 million dollar cap for the next two seasons...if you catch my drift.
KD Took Out A Page In The Local Paper To Thank The Warriors And Their Fans...In The Most Corny Way Possible
Let me start by saying that I am fully aware that the chances of Kevin Durant sitting around lining up letters in an effort to thank all worthy parties that helped him achieve the title that he preemptively won a year ago are slimmer than his stature. The last few sentences may have been a word-for-word quote, but the top was more than likely put together by some lazy intern with the personality of Klay Thompson.
That said, it is exactly the type of thing I would expect from someone that suffers as badly from a lack of swag as Kevin Durant. For instance, if KD were just a "diehard", bandwagon Warriors fan instead of their Finals MVP he would be the kid sitting in the crowd, proudly hoisting a sign that haphazardly spelled out E-S-P-N via the middle letters of some stupid, hackneyed slogan that he probably made up himself as if it were the most clever thing ever assembled.
I immediately cringed when I saw that full page ad from the 'San Francisco Chronicle'. I don't exactly think it's a coincidence that that very same expression mirrors the one I make when Kevin Durant tries to intimidatingly thump his chest after a made three, or gets snarky with the media that has been kissing his bony ass since he's came into the league. He may have a well deserved championship pedigree and a historic finals appearance under his belt, but - in my eyes - he'll always be just enough of a boob for the possibility of piss poor acronymity to exist.
What Do You Get When You Mix A Former NHL Great, An Attractive Young Gymnast, And A Relatively Short Skirt?
Oh baby! Talk about versatility! Not only is Marcel Dionne an NHL legend with over 700 career goals and some proverbial lakefront property in the NHL 'Hall Of Fame', but apparently he's also taken the crown as the king of improv! Seriously, someone get this guy a a guest spot on 'Curb Your Enthusiasm'. You thought he was unpredictable on the ice? Well, just wait until you get him off the script! Anyway, I don't know whose line it is, but I do know that the former Kings' great just put it to shame with a compliment so creative and clever that it froze an Olympic Gold medalist into nothing more than a forced grin and a painstaking chuckle...
"Look at those legs!"
Genius! A stunning combination of wit and charm! Nothing livens up an already awkward interaction quite like some good, old fashioned objectification! An old, excuse me...legendary...white guy straying from an agreed upon dialogue to openly ogle at the physical features of an attractive, accomplished woman who is young enough to be his granddaughter?! Straight up pointing at the skirt of a proud athlete that just recently decided to take the pedestal and carry the torch in the "who the fuck are you to talk about my body" movement? Seems like a great way to endear yourself to your co-presenter if you ask me!
I suppose you could argue that it wasn't entirely appropriate, but I'll be damned if it wasn't inevitable given their demographics. Let's look on the bright side, at least this time Aly Raisman can't complain that she was unfairly judged, because - objectively speaking - those stems could split skulls...whether a retired hockey player whose age lends itself to uncomfortable commentary gawked at them on stage or not.
Okay fine, it's probably more than likely complete bullshit that is the direct product of nothing more than one teenager's poorly recorded revisionist history.
Whatever the case may be, the long awaited, much anticipated, previously forbidden fruit of 'The Process' has apparently been trusting it since before one man first decided to let his career die on behalf of the sins of Philadelphia's professional basketball franchise. That's got to count for something, even if that "something" is just a largely fabricated tale to tell the kids as they watch the number of Sam Hinkie's immaculate conception (Markelle Fultz) get raised to rafters of the 'Wells Fargo Center'. Somehow, that eerily ironic story of questionable truth required more of an honest effort than the 76er's have put into winning games since 2013, so the city might as well embrace it as fact as they face the one daunting opponent their team has been actively avoiding all these years - expectations.
Look, it would be easy to say that Kevin Bieksa doesn't believe that the numbers tell the whole story because his numbers tell a story that - depending on perspective - would fall under the genre of 'horror' or 'comedy', but put yourself in his shoes for a second. How would you like people spreading fictional, critical narratives about your poor play by supporting them with quantifiable arguments that don't take into account all that super important stuff that you're good at it that just so happens to be immeasurable?
Has anyone else pondered whether the statistics of which all these hockey mathematicians are speaking have been tainted? Some say that numbers never lie, but what about when the sample size is small and insignificant? Like, for instance, the entirety of 82 games (+playoffs)? Is a season's worth of data detailing all the predominantly bad things that happened during every single second he spent on the ice supposed to be considered proof of Kevin Bieksa's struggles or something? Is that really what we are implying here?
HOGWASH! The Ducks' fans that wish their third pairing defenseman didn't have a no trade clause might pray for the day he becomes addition by subtraction, but the brainiacs that support their theory with indefinite division and multiplication should put aside their arithmetic and focus on the real "calculated" issue at hand...manipulation.
TheComeback- Faced with the decision between walking with his high school classmates at his high school graduation and playing in a game against an MLS rival, 18-year-old Tyler Adams had a unique choice to make that many could only dream of making. Despite a high school graduation being a once in a lifetime milestone achievement, Adams will be available for the Red Bulls this Saturday.
It was not a decision Adams took lightly.
“Having the opportunity to walk across that stage with all the friends that I started elementary school with, to miss something like that is tough,” Adams said in a story from NJ.com. “But I know that I have a path that I want to cement for myself, and that’s going to be coming from one of these games like this.”
I can't say that I know much about MLS soccer, but I do know this - Tyler Adams has absolutely earned the diploma that he will be too busy playing a professional sport to receive in person. Nothing proves a person's level of intelligence quite like knowing when to tell white lies, and that's exactly what he did by stating that skipping his high school graduation was a tough decision. Credit to him for saying exactly what his parents wanted to hear, but at no point was enduring far too many familiar, monotonous speeches while waiting far too long just to walk across a goddamn stage in front of people he undoubtedly can't wait to forget about a legitimate threat to his playing status.
Never mind the fact that a high school diploma is the bare minimum in terms of lifetime milestones, because the opportunity to stunt on every one of his classmates by forcing them to talk about the actual lifetime milestone he was elsewhere achieving is an opportunity that would have had him absent regardless of their schedule. You know what's better than walking with the friends that you started elementary school with? Reminding them that - relative to you - they are all losers. Tyler Adams isn't skipping some symbolic stroll into adulthood because one game during his rookie season is going to cement his legacy. He's skipping it because ever person that asks "where's Ty?" will spark another conversation about how Ty is killin' the game. Well, that and playing soccer is far more entertaining than trying to fight of a nap while listening to a bunch of teachers that are desperate for second hand pride try to convince you that not getting held back in high school is actually impressive.
Marian Hossa Is Succumbing To A Rare, Progressive Skin Condition...And Allowing The Blackhawks To Beat The Balls Off The Salary Cap
Over the course of the last few years, under the supervision of the Blackhawks medical staff, I have been privately undergoing treatment for a progressive skin disorder and the side effects of the medications involved to treat the disorder. Due to the severe side effects associated with those medications, playing hockey is not possible for me during the upcoming 2017-18 season. While I am disappointed that I will not be able to play, I have to consider the severity of my condition and how the treatments have impacted my life both on and off the ice.
From the Blackhawks:
The Chicago Blackhawks are in full support of Marian Hossa as he addresses his medical issues. This is extremely difficult for us because we all know the incredible person and player that Marian Hossa is – competitive, loyal and humble. He has played a major role in the success our franchise has experienced in recent years, which makes his departure from our lineup a significant loss. His teammates and coaches know he battled through some very tough physical difficulties but never complained or missed games despite the challenges he faced. The organization will continue to provide him every resource he needs to maintain his health.
From Blackhawks team physician Dr. Michael Terry:
Marian has been dealing with the effects of a progressive skin disorder that is becoming more and more difficult to treat and control with conventional medications while he plays hockey. Because of the dramatic nature of the medications required and their decreasing effectiveness, we strongly support his decision not to play during the 2017-18 season. We feel in the most certain terms this is the appropriate approach for Marian in order to keep him functional and healthy in the short term and throughout his life.
I have never, in my entire life, been more sure that an organization made a deal with the devil. I don't doubt the severity of Marian Hossa's skin condition because I don't think a consummate professional athlete that proud and accomplished would unofficially walk away from hockey just to free up salary cap space. However, the fact that a player as proud and accomplished as Marian Hossa was forced to walk away from hockey during the one time in which it would most benefit the long term success of his team? That's just a little too suspicious for me not to believe that it's a direct byproduct of a handshake with lucifer.
Stan Bowman and the Chicago Blackhawks have been dancing around salary cap hell like they have been tip toeing over hot coals for years, and this situation simply solidifies that the most evil of genius was keeping them from feeling the burn. A 38 year old professional hockey player having a skin condition caused by the equipment he's worn for...umm...his entire fucking life that allowed him to play in the NHL for damn near two decades and participate in nearly 80 games last season ever-so-suddenly progresses to a literal point of no return? And in the process it frees his team of the financial woes that served as the only downside to signing him to a 12 year, ludicrously front loaded contract?
I don't want to marginalize the pain and anguish that Marian Hossa must have been/still is battling through on a daily basis, but this is the most convenient epidermal allergy in the history of epidermal allergies. In fact, it's unquestionably too convenient for me to believe that there aren't external, corrupt forces that brought intolerable discomfort to a future 'Hall Of Famer' at the ass end of an inflated contract, thus giving the Blackhawks the ability to scratch the itch that was their monetary restrictions.
Dwight Howard Got Traded To The Hornets For Peanuts, And I Wonder What The Hornets Have Against Peanuts
I know the news circulating throughout the beginning of the NBA offseason has seemingly been minute-to-minute, so this ironic turn of events shouldn't be too, too surprising. That said, Dwight Howard checking his mentions on trade ideas only to find out he had been traded during the initial wave of unquestionably rational and poignant Twitter responses is honestly something that could only happen to potentially the most disrespected talent in NBA history. This is the most harmless thing that a professional athlete has ever posted on social media, and yet it still - somehow - ended up being used as a punchline against the player that has become a walking , talking, and now tweeting parody of himself...
Unfortunately, I think we have arrived in a place where I actually feel bad for Dwight Howard. When I first read that the Atlanta Hawks traded down and picked up a goddamn Plumlee just to shed the inflated contract of a homegrown star my instinctual reaction was "there is still a team out there that wants Dwight Howard?!". It was only then that I came to the realization that I am being too hard on the automatic double-double who already has a spot saved for him in the basketball 'Hall Of Fame'.
Now, I still think he's an enigmatic, overgrown child that refuses to accept that the only thing dumber than running your offense through a big man who has his back to the basket is running your offense through a big man who - objectively speaking - stinks with his back to the basket. His laughably belated decision to start working on his three point shooting as someone that still can't consistently make a foul shot certainly hasn't swayed that opinion. I maintain that if I were concerned with winning games or harboring a healthy, happy locker room then the disease that is Dwight Howard is still the last guy I would inject into my organization.
Regardless, I can't - in good conscience - act like the Charlotte Hornets lost a trade in which they moved up in the draft, got rid of a white Dukey that can't shoot, and added one of the best rebounders and rim protectors in the league. That doesn't mean they won't regret making the deal the first time he decides to be himself and shows the true colors that lie beneath that forced, disingenuous smile. On the other hand, it does mean they can puff their chest out for the months leading up to the moment they realize why literally every other team has treated a productive player like the plague.
I'm going to say something here that most fans are going to take as blasphemy. The new jerseys that the Devils have debuted really aren't all that bad. That might be a tough argument to support while looking at this online store-esque mock-up that looks like a cheap, corny long sleeve t-shirt that you would stash in your closet for the foreseeable future after gritting a smile while opening it on Christmas...
However, I'm of the opinion that they appear to be a rather sleek alteration to a traditional look when seen in the actual element in which they matter...on the backs of the players that will be wearing them bi-weekly come October...
Now admittedly, there are few reasons why I wasn't about to throw my computer on the ground and jump up and down on it like an angry toddler who was denied his favorite cereal.
For one, when I originally heard that the Devils were changing their uniforms the mental images that popped in my head would have had Lou Lamoriello waking up in a cold sweat. The fact that the logo, colors, and general layout remain unchanged was enough to make me breathe deeply instead of bitch loudly.
Secondly, this is far too exciting of a time for Devils fans to be sitting here whining about a missing inch and a half of black fabric on opposable shoulder blades. Excuse me for my unmitigated optimism, but the Devils have the first overall pick in the NHL draft in TWO days. So no, you won't catch me whining about the slightest of changes to a jersey when that jersey is (hopefully) getting pulled over the head of their future #1 center. Especially since vehemently hating it isn't going to change it anytime soon.
Lastly, some of these changes are...::audible gasp::...actually good. To say that the red collar, enlarged arm bands, and absence of an apron stripe give the jersey a cleaner, sharper (though not necessary better) look doesn't make you a bad fan with no sense of history...it makes you person with working eyeballs.
They'll definitely still take some time to get used to, but how about we see them on the ice one single time before we claim that they have been ruined forever with relatively minor tweaks. If they are fire enough for Taylor Hall (who definitely wasn't asked by the franchise to defend them on a public forum) then they are fire enough for me...
Honestly, I feel as though I could have written these tweets myself.
Hold on, let me explain...
In no way do I agree with Grayson Murray's black-and-mostly white opinion on the state of totalllllly non-existent discrimination in the police force. I don't spend anywhere near enough time wandering the oh-so-fairways where this type of innuendo was reinforced via interactions with his extremely diverse and cultured peers on the greens of 'Pleasantville'.
I just think that if given his name, profession, and the picture above, I probably could have typed out - almost word for word - what his thoughts were on the matter. The cliched narratives and baseless, context-free arguments used to completely marginalize the plight of African Americans while blindly supporting the entirety of a profession that historically has a corruption issue? What better time to put them down on a public platform than immediately after the exoneration of a cop that shot a black man dead in front of his wife and kid for legally carrying a firearm?!?
Those nauseatingly repetitive talking points that used nitpicked numbers and shameless victim blaming to claim that the long standing concept of racial profiling is as real as the "threat" that Trayvon Martin served as don't belong anywhere in society. However, if there were a place where they could feel at home it would be on the Twitter feed of a professional golfer named Grayson who was once forced to play without a tooth, recently fired his caddy mid-round, and has used social media to publicly hit on a naive teenager who quickly learned why he's so detestable...
I know I am in the minority here, but I'm rooting for the minority here. I just think Conor McGregor's incessant, over the top trash talk is going to get pretty fucking old as this "fight" grows closer. I love senseless bickering and unsubstantiated machismo as much as the next guy, but it packs a much bigger punch (pun intended) when there's higher than a snow ball's chance in hell that it gets validated. I get that most people are on the side of the self absorbed loudmouth that stands just north of virtually no shot whatso-fucking-ever of beating the wealthier, more accomplished self absorbed loudmouth. I just really don't know if I can take two months worth of potshots seriously when they come from a guy whose dream sequence of a mural could come to fruition and he would still probably lose.
Honestly, Conor McGregor could catch Floyd Mayweather clean across the jaw (as pictured) and it would probably go down as nothing more than one punch landed on the scorecard that was immediately responded to with a quick 20 jab combo that had it's recipient looking like he took a full bottle of Jameson off the forehead. All due respect to the artist, but it's for that reason - and that reason only - that I am having a tough time keeping my eyes from traveling up into my head and right back down in response to thee most lifelike portrayal of a chin check that is more than more than likely never going to take place. I don't need (or want, for that matter) athletes in combats sports to turn humble because then this fight would offer almost nothing in terms of entertainment, but the grossness with which the wall of that training facility misrepresents the upcoming fight is almost too egregious to laugh at. Plus, I'm pretty sure 'Benjamin Moore' would have donated those cans of paint to literally any respectable cause if they knew they were going to be wasted on something that needed to be quickly coated over come August 27th.
A Couple High School Basketball Coaches In Oklahoma Were Fired For Using A School Bus To Make A Beer Run
TheComeback- Two high school basketball coaches in Tishomingo, Oklahoma have been fired from Tishomingo High School after using a school bus to go buy alcohol.
The two men purchased beer during an out-of-town trip with the team, according to KFOR: “It sort of just disappointed us all,” basketball player Kyle Miller told reporters.
The team was at a basketball camp at Connors State College in nearby Warner, Oklahoma, about two and a half hours from home. While there, the beer run took place at a local convenience store.
What the coaches did was completely wrong, but they were smart enough to not bring minors along for the ride with them.
“We noticed that the school bus was gone but he had told us to stay in our dorms and so we proceeded to do that and we just didn’t find anything out until the next day,” Miller said.
If the players didn’t know where the coaches were going and the coaches didn’t bring anyone along, how exactly did Tishomingo High School officials find out? According to KXII, someone who worked at the convenience store reported the coaches to officials at Connors State.
“We were pretty upset because we paid money out of pocket to go to that camp, because we had to stay for three nights and we had to end up leaving on the second day,” Miller said.
Ahhh, the casual reminder that the more things change, the more they stay the same. Slightly weird that it took a bunch of grown men hijacking a school bus to cruise for some booze when they were supposed to be watching over minors for me to truly appreciate that semi-nonsensical saying, but - hey - here we are I suppose.
The fact of the matter is that sometimes you just need beer, and it's during those times when you'll do literally anything to get it. I would think that a (hypocritical) high schooler like Kyle Miller would understand that as he has surely benefited from plenty of fake ID's and unlocked liquor cabinets, but such is the selfishness of our youth. Little assholes can't just look in the mirror, picture themselves 20 years older, and equally as desperate for alcohol. Just too in their own world to realize that social anxiety that can only be cured by substance abuse isn't something that you grow out of. In fact, I could argue that the only people more in need of beer than awkward teenagers that are trying to touch each other's privates is school officials that just completed a day of making sure that the stupid children of others didn't die.
Now, they probably should have parked their predominantly scholastic mode of transportation around the corner to avoid a visual that surely looked like kids lying in wait of their questionable supervision while taking up half a liquor store parking lot, but that's not the point. The point is that feeling compelled to do what it takes to guarantee yourself a well deserved drink is a desire as natural as the one that's ultimately responsible for the bitchy, ungrateful kids that were tasked with staying out of trouble for 15 minutes. And If you ask me, these coaches didn't need some snitch ass, bitch ass of a liquor store clerk to take time away from selling eventual DUI's in Podunk County, Oklahoma to insert himself in that all-too-prevelant process.
SportsNet- Terry Bross discussed Arizona’s decision to not bring Doan back for the 2017-18 season Monday on Sportsnet 590 The Fan’s Prime Time Sports.
“I was surprised at the way it happened and, frankly, I think it could have been handled a little better,” Bross said. “But it’s the nature of the beast, it’s the nature of the business that changes, ownership changes and organizations change, they go young, they get old and things change.”
“I think it should have been a little more than that after 22 years with the Jets/Coyotes,” Bross said.
“I understand that it was an uncomfortable thing to do and that comes with being a GM or a president of an organization those are the uncomfortable conversations that you have.
“But I think that his body of work over the years and what he means to the city and what he’s done for this organization merited more than a quick conversation in a public restaurant.”
In public? IN PUBLIC!?! The Arizona Coyotes ended their relationship with their much more eligible captain in a goddamn restaurant? A marriage that lasted nearly two decades longer than any marriage to a completely defunct organization that is incapable of running itself properly and locating itself conveniently had it's conclusion interrupted by the waitress taking drink orders?! I know that business is business and that (luckily for him) Shane Doan wasn't going to be playing in the desert forever, but handling that business in a place of business thus making it other people's business is unquestionably bad business. The Coyotes treated the dismissal of the most respected, accomplished, and loyal player in their franchise's history in the same fashion that a teenager treats the dumping of his hormonal girlfriend of three weeks. They basically tried to shame him into a subdued reaction by doing it in front of strangers.
Now, I know the Coyotes' front office likely rented out a private room in a nice restaurant to soften the blow of the bad news, but the beauty of being given a lack of details is that you can basically make them up yourself. That's why I picture the man who just gained sole ownership of the team a week ago dismissing the long-time leader of said team under the backdrop of a bunch of haphazardly hung trinkets as half price apps were arriving at the table. Somehow that seems much more fitting of an organization whose successful "steps" at avoiding relocation have been about as calculated as those of a belligerently drunk buffoon magically stumbling through traffic like 'Frogger' on the freeway.
Oh well, at least Shane Doan can be the first person in history to take the "it's not you, it's me" excuse at face value...
Did Dan Gilbert Just Admit Defeat In Next Year's LeBron James Sweepstakes By Refusing To Pay David Griffin?
The funny thing about pride is that it can be an unrelenting son of a bitch if it's powers of persuasion aren't closely monitored. Dan Gilbert's pride has gotten him/is getting him into more problematic situations than even the most drunken of erect dicks. First the letter that was littered with lies that were poorly disguised as pipe dreams, and now the cutting of ties with the one person most likely to do what's necessary to keep LeBron James in Cleveland? The owner of the Cavaliers is willingly letting his dumbass dignity become his downfall by preemptively pushing the best player in basketball off into West Coast sunset before he's even decided to do so on his own will. He's like the dude in 'She's Not In Your League' in the sense that he's setting the groundwork for a breakup because he's not confident enough in his own organization's ability to avoid another one in the near future. It's almost as if he's attempting to turn the likelihood of a second disastrous departure into a complete certainty so that he can confidently spend a full year crafting the next literary takedown of the man that finally brought him his long awaited championship.
I'm far from a LeBron James' apologist, and usually I would roll my eyes at one of his passive aggressive subtweets, but his boss basically begged for this one...
Planning for life after LeBron while you still have LeBron is like sitting at home mourning the death of a loved one while that loved one is laid up in a hospital bed wondering when the fuck you are going to visit. It's going to hurt just as badly when they actually are gone so you might as well do everything possible to appease them while they are still with you. I can't imagine a billionaire is used to getting bent over the barrel by someone who is a subordinate (in theory much more than in practice) on a yearly basis, but if Dan Gilbert thinks he's doing his franchise any favors by tightening his sphincter in relation to next year's roster then he's got another (much more unforgiving) thing coming. If their future doesn't include LeBron James then there is no amount of assets that will keep it from becoming a barren basketball wasteland, so those assets might as well be spent frivolously in hopes of dethroning the Warriors. Another title could be the only thing that keeps the King's reign in Cleveland alive past next summer, and that reign - as up in the air as it might be - is much more valuable on the court and in the front office than whatever Dan Gilbert refused to pay David Griffin.
This move reads like an admission of defeat, and the only thing worse than losing is quitting.