A KHL Reporter Literally Had To Eat His Own Words With A Spoon After A Guarantee Gone Awry2/20/2017 PuckDaddy- A hockey writer in Belarus has been forced to literally eat his own words after his playoff predictions proved incorrect.
Vyacheslav Fedorenkov, who covers the Kontinental Hockey League (KHL) for a leading Belarusian sports paper, Pressball, claimed Dinamo Minsk would fail to make it to the postseason, but the team’s strong results left him eating more than humble pie. With a paper napkin tucked neatly into his shirt as he sat at the Minsk Arena press centre, Fedorenkov worked his way through an unconventional pairing of soup and a four-page issue of Pressball from February 2016, when he first made the fateful promise, according to the website Naviny.by. Minsk have won nine of their last 10 games in the regular season, which wraps up Saturday, placing fifth in the Western Conference. The KHL is traditionally dominated by Russian powerhouses. Dinamo coach Craig Woodcroft, from Toronto, On., watched on alongside local reporters. “I will remember his deed every time I enter this room,” the former Team Canada player said, according to BBC Sport. For his part, Fedorenkov said he will be more careful about his promises in the future. “Don’t joke like this and don’t make such promises, because they are pretty difficult to deliver.” This may seem counterintuitive since I am proved wrong far more often than this one single time I am choosing to publicly admit occasional defeat simply because it supports my point, but I am totally in favor of this becoming a thing. I can't say I have a strong desire to eat a hot lunch fresh from the presses, but I would gladly introduce some faulty ink to my diet if it meant that every other sports personality agreed to do so as well. I'd have to hold my nose with the endless amount of bull I have crapped across my keyboard, but it would be well worth it to have FS1 turn into a 24 hour live stream of Skip Bayless and friends devouring their intentionally trashy takes out of a dumpster. Let's face it, not even Lance Armstrong looks like as much of a jackass in retrospect as those that form steadfast opinions on the future performances of athletes partaking in competitions that are only predictable in the sense that Las Vegas always ends up winning. Having to shamelessly own your half-baked hindsight is an unavoidable occupational hazard of being overly invested in sports but not being nearly talented enough to be to do your radicalized talking from a professional field of play. I'll tell you this though - I don't think it would take too many rectal paper cuts to clean up the state of sports media. You can bet your bloody asshole that the sharp edges of that paper would dull the boldness of the content if it's ingestion ultimately led to some messy digestion. I try to stay out of the business of getting constantly humbled, but I would dip my toes in if it meant that shameless sportscasters had to drowned in their candor-less sea of shitty, preemptive conclusions.
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