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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Adam Henrique Burned Adam Larsson On Instagram, And I Am Already Loving This New Social Media Policy

10/13/2015

7 Comments

 

Whoever made this meme... Nailed it!

A photo posted by Adam Henrique (@adamhenrique) on Oct 11, 2015 at 8:35am PDT

Wait just a goddamn minute? Is that a New Jersey Devils player showing that he has a personality on social media? Ray Shero is letting players be themselves? On the internet of all places?!? What a concept! What a time to be alive! The Devils may still suck on the rink, but at least now they can poke fun at each other and make us laugh off the rink. Who would have thought that making the players more relatable to the casual consumer would actually turn out well? Who would have thought that fans would want a glimpse into the lives of the guys they follow so feverishly? Adam Henrique isn't just a guy that scored one of the biggest goals in recent Devils history, but he's also ::gasp:: kind of funny sometimes. Adam Larsson isn't just a talented, young defenseman, but he's also a little bit of a perv that can't get through the opening credits without inconspicuously slipping his hand onto the thigh of his flavor of the week. Shhhh, don't tell Lou Lamoriello we found out.

I'm not even sure this is a knock on Adam Larsson. He's a 23 year old from Sweden. Europeans don't "NetFlix and chill". They are sexually liberated. They don't need the guise of watching a monthly television subscription to justify staying in to fuck on a Friday night. I can just imagine them trying to explain the concept to Larsson. "No Adam, women in the states are easy too, but you just got to pretend to watch a pilot episode or two before they have sex with you. You've got to fulfill their selfish need to not feel easy before you can sleep with them". Probably seems like the biggest waste of time ever. Beautiful Swedish people don't think they should have to wait more than 10 minutes for sex and I tend to agree with them. Using shitty sitcoms as foreplay is for us average looking American folk. There's too many women and not enough time for a man of Adam Larsson's ilk. He can't waste that time getting to know the main characters on whatever romantic comedy some 23 year old floozy from Hoboken is patterning her life after, he's got practice in the morning.
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