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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Annnnnd We Have Our First Transgendered Beer (Eye Roll)

11/4/2015

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Mirror- The world's first 'transgender beer' is about to be served in a Soho bar.

No Label is a 'non-binary' brew made with hermaphroditic hops that have changed sex.

And the transsexual tipple, called No Label, will be available at the new Brewdog bar in London's West End later this week.

The beer is a Kölsch, neither a lager nor an alem and weighs in at 4.6 per cent ABV.

It is brewed using hops flowers which underwent a sex change from female to male just before being harvested.



So, are we talking pre-op or post-op hops? I know we are going with this all too clever 'No Label' slogan here, but there's nothing worse than not knowing what you are drinking. The article clearly states that these hops have undergone a sex change, but it also states that they are "hermaphroditic". This is the problem I have with this whole phenomenon. Make up your damn mind. The term "transgender" has become far too broad. Are we talking man hops that are masquerading as woman hops? Have the hops doubled down and undergone a full transition? Are they gender neutral hops that were born with a genetic abnormality? Like if the hops wanted to go to the bathroom  in a public school would they use the men's room or the women's room? Are these hops standing up or sitting down to pee? Are they shopping for tampons or condoms? Were their childhood sheets blue or pink? So many questions and the only answer I get is 'no label'. Well, you know what, I like to fancy myself as someone that will drink anything, but this transgendered beer can kick rocks. Pound sand 'Brew Dog'. Not because of how you identify your product, but because you don't identify your product. I don't care what you do to the hops. I accept all hops as long as they have a clear distinction of what they want to be. These hops seem confused and unsure of themselves, and that's never fully satisfied anyone.

P.S. Maybe if I get drunk enough I'll accidentally try one. That's when my hop standards go out the window. Going to have to improve on that 4.6 ABV to reach that point though.
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