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Apple Watch Sales Are Down 90% Because Sales Are Now Dependent On People With Brains

7/10/2015

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CNBC- Online sales of the Apple Watch in the U.S. have fallen by 90 percent since the device launched in April, according to market researcher company Slice Intelligence. 

"Apple Watch sales continue to decline in June," Slice Intelligence tweeted on Tuesday, alongside a graph showing a steep decline in demand for the smartwatch since its launch date. 

Online sales in the U.S. slipped around 90 percent to below 5,000 per day in late June and again in early July, having peaked above 40,000 in mid-to-late April, according to Slice Intelligence.




No shit? You don't say. The ground breaking technology company couldn't find a way to sell the general public on a overpriced wrist band? You want to know the reason why the Apple watch even had the ability to have such a drastic downturn in sales? Because you could slap an Apple logo on a bag of fertilizer and an Apple loyalist living in a New York City high rise that hasn't seen a lawn in a decade would still buy it. I don't like to use the term 'sheep', because despite being a little hesitant to new technology, I still end up being persuaded into buying a lot of the useless crap that comes out anyway. With that said, if you were waiting in line for the release of a watch in 2015 you are either a sheep or a douchebag, take your pick. Don't get it twisted. I love watches. One of the things I take pride in is keeping my watch game strong. However, if you think I am paying anything over $150 for something I am only going to look at if someone compliments me on it you are out your rabbit ass mind. I wouldn't go as far as saying that watches are obsolete, but they certainly aren't anything more than an aesthetic accessory anymore. Shit, I could have 6 watches on and if you asked me the time I am still going to look at my phone. Mostly because that is something that has been engrained in me by Apple and the iPhone. They are long removed from biting off the hand they are trying to feed from with the Apple watch.

I'm sure there are a lot of neat features that come with the Apple watch. It's probably just a much harder to navigate version of the phone that currently resides in my pocket. Unlike the iPhone, if I see a person walking down the street fiddling with their watch like they are 'Knight Rider' I am instantly judging them. I don't even know why but I just picture these idiots walking into oncoming traffic while squinting at their wrist and whispering 'Go-Go Gadget Instagram'. There's nothing convenient about strapping a smaller version of your phone on your hand and thus rendering one of the limbs that you would use to navigate it useless. Nice try Apple, but stick to making overpriced phones that differ from the previous version in size only. Stick to churning out unnecessary upgrades that I say I won't buy until I end up doing so anyway. That's your niche. It ain't broke. Don't fix it.
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