Oh, heavens to fucking Betsy! You see what you have done sports media? You've got me so flustered that I am using phrases that I don't even understand. Will someone get Ramona Shelbourne an apple pie before she eats her fist? She's just mad because the last time anyone discussed pushing a baby out of her was when she ate their young. Hey Brian Windhorst, do you mind if I get in a follow up question? I promise I will hurry. I know your time is extremely valuable. So valuable in fact that you haven't had one second to hit a stair master or take a peak at your penis in a decade, but I digress. Mr. Windhorst, why is it okay for the sports media to waste Steph Curry's time asking him brainless, cliche questions that garner the same brainless, cliche answers, yet it's not okay for Steph Curry and his child to waste their time? Hell, the best question that was asked at last game's presser was asked by Draymond Green. All these postgame press conferences are is a waste of time. Your job, Mr. Windhorst, is to waste people's time. In essence, the entirety of your fat, gluttonous being is a waste of time and space. Look at the big old bully Brian Windhorst up their on his pedestal of judgement hating on the presence of a child. If that tower he is in was any more ivory he would be sweating through it. We're talking about the same guy that follows the biggest child in the world, LeBron James, around on a day to day basis. The same guy that reports whether he is or isn't going to wear a headband that night. The same guy whose job relies on every childish antic that the 6'8, 250 pound toddler has ever resorted to. That Brain Windhorst is too thrown off by a two year old to do his job and that's somehow the two year old's fault. So sorry to ruin your pristine work environment Brian. Who exactly is the child here?
God forbid that Steph Curry is holding his kid when the media has some really critical, hard hitting questions for him. I wonder what they had scripted that couldn't have been said in front of a toddler. Were they going to ask about Santa Clause or the Easter bunny? Try to debate where babies come from? Maybe criticize Steph for the amount of sweets that he lets little Riley eat? Earmuffs sweetheart, earmuffs! It's about to get real PG-13 in here.
Steph Curry is the most likable player on the most likable team left in the playoffs. They have lost 2 games total the entire postseason. I don't even know what is left to ask. Every press conference has been littered with meatballs and Steph has knocked them in to the cheap seats. Watching his kid while he caters to a bunch of media buffoons isn't beyond his abilities. In fact, it's gotten to the point where mindlessly answering stupid questions is closer to babysitting than actual babysitting. He probably just brought his first born so he didn't get put to sleep by incoherent inquiries. How about this guys? When you start doing your job we will start worrying about the factors that allow you to get it done in a timely manner.
P.S. If there has ever been anyone schooled in the art of blaming others for their troubles it's these two....