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Arian Foster Is Letting Playoff Hockey Get The Best Of Him: Says They Should Allow Fighting In NFL

5/15/2015

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Fisticuffs and football? What is more American than that?! I think I speak for all fans of the sport when I say that allowing fighting in football would be AWESOME...for about one, undoubtedly long, quarter. Fighting works in hockey. It has a purpose and a place in the sport. It's long been grandfathered in to our modern day pussified society that no longer accepts the riveting violence that comes with the culture of football and hockey. Hockey players know how to use fighting to their advantage, and when it can have a positive impact on the game. It's safe to say that is not something that is easily learned. It's not something that can be easily adopted by a sport that includes the biggest, fastest, baddest athletes trying to end each other's careers on a play by play basis.

The reason that you could never legalize fighting in the NFL, among other things, is the same reason that PED use hasn't been legalized in baseball. Sure, it could certainly aide in the recovery of a lot of injuries, but for every person out there using it for good there would be thousand players using it to up their batting average and annual salary. It's the same reason that marijuana isn't completely legal everywhere now. Not that I agree, but the decision makers fear that for every person it could help medically, there are probably 10 people that would get high and walk into oncoming traffic looking for a Chipotle. It's not that fighting in sports doesn't have a purpose, it's that the slope is more slippery than a pouring Vaseline down a double black diamond. The people that would stand to benefit from fighting aren't responsible enough to use it for good. There is probably at least one or two points of a football game when both parties could gain from taking out their frustrations on each other. Truth be told, it would probably result in less penalties from both participants as the game progressed. However, if you think introducing fighting to football wouldn't end up in hour long brawls you are beside your mind.

Just thinking of a 180 pound scrawny white man trying to break up a fist fight between two 350 pound behemoths is a hilarious mental image. Talking about fighting in other sports kind of trivializes the ultimate equalizer that exists in hockey...ice. You know why you rarely see a clean knockout blow during a hockey fight? Because both people are clutching and grabbing and trying not to crack their own head open on the sheet of glass below. Fights on stable ground are far more dangerous. You don't give the strongest athletes that the world has to offer secure terrain if what they are going to use it for is to try to decapitate their colleagues. As successful as the NFL is, I don't think they have the money to handle the lawsuits that would come with 3,000 concussions and a couple of on-field deaths per year. If we are being honest, we are lucky that it's decreasing existence in hockey still maintains a semblance of a presence at all. Plus, I don't know what sport Adrian is watching, but the rare fight that does take place during playoff hockey certainly doesn't put an end to any 'jaw-jackin'. If anything, it leaves the player's lips looser than an 75 year old prostitute. 

I'll tell you what though, the ten minutes of football that would get played before it would be banned would be must see TV, especially if you didn't have jaw-jackin' cat in the fight.
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