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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Baylor's Associate Athletic Director Raced A Tackling Dummy And Won...But Also Lost

8/7/2017

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Picture

The time @SeanJpadden raced the Dummy for Curfew! #ManVsMachine pic.twitter.com/Xgc7tCcJ6c

— Matt Rhule (@CoachMattRhule) August 4, 2017

It's almost as if it were written in the clouds. It may have had something to do with Sean Padden's inability to stay in his damn lane due to his almost immediate shortness of breath, but the fact of the matter is that you accept that you're going to end up being the butt of the joke when you agree to race as a fat guy. Baylor's Associate Athletic Director may have crossed the finish line first, but - in some way or another - he was bound to be considered the loser here. He actually got a pretty quick jump off the line and had a pretty high motor for a guy whose idea of exercise is probably a midnight Taco Bell run, but that simply wasn't funny enough for a race featuring a fat guy until that tackling dummy exacted it's revenge on him. That's why I have no choice but to consider this a fateful result. Unless - of course - it was done intentionally to get some laughs and distract people from realizing that Baylor is still allowed to foster a football team after the last few raped half of the female student body. 
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