I actually think the most fitting thing about this hyperbolical jab at Dwight Howard is that it came out of absolutely nowhere during a rare calm of a sports news cycle that is an otherwise unrelenting storm. Unless I missed him trying obnoxiously hard to be charming at the ESPY's or something, a well-respected journalist was given next to no reason to go as far as to say he'd rather risk his life in a handicapped death match than share a starting five with a future HOFer. That leads me to believe that the explanation behind that personal attack is as simple as Bob Ryan becoming aggravated by the mere utterance of Dwight Howard's name or the unexpected sight of his face. There aren't many public figures that don't even have to do anything wrong, right, or indifferent to illicit a visceral reaction from those that find them to be abhorrent humans beings, but the double-double disease possesses a smile that's more quick to induce an allergic-like reaction than cat hair. All that being said, I have to disagree with Bob Ryan here. I mean, this is just a gross mischaracterization of who Dwight Howard is. He might make you want to hop atop a stepping stool to punch him in the face on sight, but it takes at least two weeks for him to disrupt team chemistry and infect the entirety of the locker room. If it were a seven-game series for my life then I'd have to heavily weigh the pros and cons, but a single game? Hell, I might even throw him the ball on the block during the first (inevitably wasted) possession to buy myself a couple hours of goodwill with a guy whose presence typically ages as poorly as the cheesiness of his grin. The invite to join the rest of the squad for postgame beers to celebrate the continuation of my life would get "lost in the mail", but I've had positive interactions with sociopaths that lasted far longer than 4 quarters and lived to tell the tale.
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