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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Dad Goes On Drunken Tirade During A Kid's Hockey Game, And I Totally See Where He is Coming From

2/23/2015

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Okay, so let's try to make this post relatable. I think it is a fair assumption to say that most, if not all, people have watched a children's soccer game. Is there anything worse then sitting there and watching, what feels like 300 uninterested, uncoordinated children run around a field tripping all over each other? In the upset of the century, there actually is. Now imagine having that children's soccer game being played on ice in a cold building, adding thin steel blades to their feet, making the target much, much smaller. and taking $1,500 dollars out of your pocket for equipment. All for a sport they will probably quit after 6 months. I would legitimately rather watch a video of how I am going to die than an entire children's hockey game. 

Unfortunately, at some point in my life, I am going to be in a similar situation. It's goes without saying that my child is going to play in the NHL, and it's going to be very hard for him to do such if he doesn't first play peewee against a bunch of borderline handicapped children. I, undoubtedly will have to be in attendance, and if you think I am doing so without the help of Mr. Daniel's to coat my insides than you are beside your mind.  Television always makes it look like the drunks are the bad parents. My guess is that those script writers haven't spent much time watching elementary sporting events. I'm pretty sure the secret to raising your children right is some properly timed alcohol abuse. Watch three periods of kids helplessly drifting around the neutral zone and I guarantee you'll be fighting the urge to beat a child.

Am I saying that you should show up shitfaced and start dropping every derogatory term under the sun? No, probably not, but I respect this man for sticking to his guns. Every hockey fan has had one too many and let a few fuck's fly. As soon as your inappropriate in public once you might a well have some fun with it. If you are going to be an asshole, at least be a steadfast asshole. No one respects the guy that let's a curse slip and then immediately apologizes for it. From the first 'fuck' to the last 'motherfucker' this guy never wavered from his position of belligerence. Can't stop, won't stop. Sure, he'll go home later and regret making an ass of himself, but that's a problem for the future. The only problem he has currently is that his beer muscles might kill that guy. Unless of course he trips over the bleachers trying to get to him. 

Make no mistake, the bad guy here is the drunk schmuck yelling about God knows what while a couple of kids that don't know where babies come from fall all over themselves. However, the guy whining in the stands parallels him in obnoxiousness. You bring your kids to a hockey game and they might hear some shit you don't want them to hear. That's just the nature of the beast. From mites, to the pros, to men's beer league. The concept of free speech couldn't apply more once the puck drops. You want your kids to think the world is all sunshine and rainbows then get a sitter. This game isn't for the clean of mouth.

P.S. I got to imagine that the following is the only possible next step for this guy...
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