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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Darren McFadden Cleared The Air On How He Actually Broke His Elbow...LIKE AN IDIOT

6/28/2016

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YardBarker- McFadden (Pulaski Oak Grove) said reports he broke his elbow after he fell in an attempt to save a dropped cellphone were untrue. He said he was in a friend’s backyard after a funeral and slipped on cement near a swimming pool.

“I just slipped down and landed on my elbow,” he said. “My phone was in my hand, and so people kind of put that story out.”

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“I got a few weeks left in this brace, but other than that, my body feels good,” McFadden said. “I feel great, and I’m looking forward to the season. I’m ready to go.”



Wait, Darren McFadden didn't break his elbow instinctually diving to catch a falling cell phone? He, instead, broke it losing his balance while casually meandering alongside a pool? Whew, I bet Jerry Jones will be glad to hear this. Hell, he might contact the league offices and see if he can reverse the selection of Ezekiel Elliot. If only he had known that walking on water like Jesus Christ himself was the only way to take down Darren McFadden for an extended amount of time then he might have gave him another shot at starting next year. Poor guy didn't get hurt doing what any self respecting person would do by risking life and limb to save their iPhone, he just lost his balance on a wet spot. That's a far more acceptable way for a professional running back to end up sidelined for a month or two. It's a good thing he decided to clear this up two weeks after the fact or we would be stuck here thinking that he was obsessed with the well being of his main connection to the outside world like every other sober person on the planet. No sir, not Darren McFadden. He would never put his own health in peril to save a piece of replaceable technology. He's just a klutz that can't manage to stay standing around the smallest drop of precipitation. 

That may not help the Dallas Cowboys any when it's 3rd and 1 and the clouds start to break, but at least it saves him an embarrassing injury story. Thank god he didn't let that sleeping dog lie or we might have died thinking that Darren McFadden wasn't a comically fragile player that only got boo-boos when attempting at least semi-athletic feats. 
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