Darren Sproles Hates Philadelphia, Like Any Other Normal Person, and You Know What That Means...

BSO- “Things get kind of frustrating. You know what I’m saying?” Sproles said. “You’re standing on the sidelines. It’s kind of frustrating. But what can you do?”

“I’m not really on the field. But I don’t get into that,” Sproles said. “If they’re going to put me on the field, they’re going to put me in. If they’re not, they’re not. You know what I’m saying? If they do put me in, I just try to make the best of it.”

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​Question. What's the NFL equivalent of a retirement home? Oh, the street? That's fantastic news. Someone pack up CJ Spiller's bags real quick and we can leave on the nearest corner. I don't know if CJ Spiller has forgotten how to play football, or if Sean Payton has forgotten how to successfully utilize a satellite back, but I'm prone to believing in the one that has a far more extensive resume than the other. For that reason CJ Spiller can kicks rocks, and Darren Sproles can come right back on down. Now that I think about it, Sprolesy is the perfect addition to this team. No, not really football wise. In fact, it probably wouldn't make much of a difference at all on the field, but at least I could squint really hard while we were on offense and pretend it was 2011 again. That would provide quite the interruption from sitting naked on the toilet crying while we are on defense. Not sure why I have to be naked, but that seems like the next logical step after giving up 40+ points to Kirk fucking Cousins. 

Hey, I just want a reminder of a better day. A better day when Sean Payton's offense wasn't just ranked #1 in the league, but it also passed the eye test of being the best in the league. A day when he would use quick pass catching running backs to give opposing defensive coordinators aneurysms. A day when screen passes were actually effective in New Orleans. Is that too much to ask? Just bring  back that shifty, 'Sonic The Hedgehog' looking motherfucker so I don't drowned in my sorrows by week 16. You don't even have to play him, just keep a camera on him at all times so I can continue living in the past, but because the present is starting to resemble 'The Great Depression'.