DeAndre Jordan Suffers Bout Of Amnesia And Costs The Clippers A Win In The Process

I want to feel bad for DeAndre Jordan here, I really do. We have all had moments, whether they be at our jobs or during our day to day lives, where you just go completely comatose. Completely forget where you are, what you are doing, or why you are doing it. Now granted, a vast majority of us don't do it while we are getting paid millions of dollars to play a professional sport, but we do it nonetheless. So if that was Jordan's only gaff in a game the Clippers should have won running away, I would be far more inclined to give him a pass. Unfortunately, DeAndre did a fantastic job of getting the TrailBlazers back in the game in the first place, after the Clippers held a double digit lead with just minutes to play. Here is the thing. If you are going to go 0-6 from the goddamn free throw line, while the other team is intentional hacking you to get back in the game then all other facets of your game have to be dialed in. You can either shoot free throws like a blind person with no motor skills or you can forget to put home a game winning dunk with under a second to play. You can't do both. I know basketball is a team sport, and I am criticizing a mere handful of plays, but if players had their own personal records for their role in the outcome of a game, Chris Paul would be walking away 1-0 as Jordan would be 0-1.

Got to feel for Chris Paul here. Has to look like a kid who didn't get what he wants in the grocery store because DeAndre Jordan can't tell the difference between a shot clock and a game clock.

When time is of the essence and there is a situation that you have no control over you tend to lose your mind. I am completely sympathetic to this situation, and anyone that has watched me play hockey knows why. Sometimes you just have to completely embarrass your teammates to make sure they don't make the same mistake again. Bet you next time DeAndre won't stand there looking like a 7 foot dope holding the game in his hands while being 2 inches away from victory. The funniest part about this is that while DeAndre Jordan stood statuesque with ball raised in one hand like he was lady liberty, he was holding the ball just out of Paul's reach. Got to imagine that if he brings that rebound down it is getting taken faster than Sasha Grey's anal virginity. What a time to go braindead. NBA players shoot after literally EVERY single whistle, and the one time they don't it's when it could actually make the difference in the game.

Some are willing to give DJ a flyer on this one because Chris Paul was the only person on the floor that knew there was a game going on. Four other Clippers and the entirety of the Portland lineup were standing there with their hands on their dicks like they were at home watching the game on the couch. Hell, I was standing 100 feet away from the play and I didn't even know what was going on. However my job at basketball game is to drink beer and obnoxiously stand up and walk away after alley-oops, not pay attention to the intricacies of the game.  How many wrongs does it take to make a right? Just because you are surrounded by idiots doesn't mean you can go without criticism when you act like an idiot yourself. Just because all your friends drove home drunk too, it doesn't mean it's not your fault when you're the one that crashes into a telephone pole. Maybe they should work on this in practice. Every time Chris Paul screams, DeAndre Jordan has to dunk a basketball. Turn it into a Pavlov's dog situation. Ironic given the fact that this closely resembles an owner scolding a dog after he shits on the floor, while the dog just sits there mindlessly staring into space.

P.S. Besides setting up what should have been a game winning play call, what were they talking about during the timeout? There were 2.5 seconds left, you would think the fact that two buzzers were set to go off during that time frame would be a topic of conversation. C'mon Doc, we are taking away that PhD until further notice. Your one job is make sure your players know the situation before they go out to execute it. 

P.P.S. In case your lip reading skills aren't up to par, that's a pretty blatant "shoot the motherfuckin' ball".