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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Devils Net 6 In Victory Over Flyers And Probably Won't Lose A Game For The Foreseeable Future

10/10/2014

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Can you win a Stanley Cup in October? Wait, stupid question.The Devils just did. Was there ever any doubt? Pour the champagne. Reserve the table at the titty bar. This team has got the stuff legends are made of. Or maybe half the players are just old enough to be legends…either way. Sure they blew a 3 goal lead faster than a prepubescent boy blows his load. Whatever, they can't all be pretty. When you sleep with a 4 you still tally it on the stat sheet. When you have lavish plans of going 98-0 you are going to need a little puck luck. 

Cammalleri on pace for 164 goals. I wouldn't bet my house on it, but you probably should. Easy money. Great signing. Going to fit in perfectly with that puck wheelin', dick slingin' duo of Zajac and Jagr. Ryder coming in hot game one before he pulls his annual 20 game disappearing act, that was nice to see. I would have more to say on the specifics of the game if I wasn't two beers short of all out blitzed in the suite level. 
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Did Schneider just get goal support? A fuckin' 6er on a Thursday night? Thought that stopped after college. Must be Christmas. I told y'all! It's a new season! If we plan on winning a lot of games in that fashion I am going to need an economy size box of diapers. I was sweating like a hooker at the pearly gates during the 3rd period. It is what it is though. A win is a win is a motherfuckin' win, as they say…I think. 

Shower me with Marty jokes Philly fans. It reeks of jealousy. We know you haven't found a goalie that is capable of backstopping a Fisher-Price net with any consistency.  Making fun of our wealth at the position isn't exactly the direction I would go. The Devils are the 1% in terms of goaltending while the Flyers have been cashing welfare checks since Hextall retired. Nice save on that Zubrus shot Mason ::fart noise::

There's only one way to start a season. Gotta give the Flyers a good ass pounding to get things rollin' in the right direction. That sodomy special would make a Sayreville football player blush. They should probably post the highlights of the game of PornHub. #1 result under 'Forced Anal'. Bite the pillow Philadelphia, we just went in dry!
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Looks like the fan in the background is enjoying how that dick tastes. Remember bro, spitters are quitters.
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