Draymond Green Making 3-1 Jokes Is Just Going To Remind People That He's The Main Reason They Exist

Man 3-1 sucks

— Draymond Green (@Money23Green) November 3, 2016

Look, we can all admit we are/were getting a little tired of the 3-1 jokes. The new NBA season is upon us, there's no shortage of ridiculous storylines to run with, and the last thing that we should be focusing on is how last year ended. Unfortunately, we - as a whole - just can't do it. Not because I don't want us to move forward to the next nauseating repetitive meme, but because I don't want us to let the guy that likely cost his team a championship by nut tapping every competitor within a 5 foot radius feel some false sense of vindication. 

You see, as observers we can say that Cleveland got what they deserved last night. We can talk about how the Indians losing in gut wrenching fashion is the universe's way of correcting itself in preventing the city the goddamn Browns call home - of all places - from becoming an obnoxiously cocky 'Titletown' of sorts. We all watched that "woe is me" '30-for-30' where every fan in Ohio seemed fully invested in every single one of the professional sports teams that plays there. Therefore, we can all now laugh at the 'BelieveLand' nickname and pretend that blowing a familiar series lead in one sport has something to do with how obnoxious you're allowed to be about overcoming that same series lead in a completely different sport. We can act as if all Indians fans are Cavaliers fans, all Cavaliers fans are Indians fan, and that the sports gods decided to even the score after that group of people talked so much shit that they were bound to slip and land face first in it. We can do all of that because we are just fans and our thoughts and actions don't really have to make any logical sense to anyone but us.  

You know who can't do it? Draymond Green. I refuse to stand by and let the man that very likely cost his team a 2nd consecutive championship by physically abusing more dicks than a dominatrix act like his stupidity on the basketball court has somehow been avenged by the results of a baseball game. We are allowed to make cross-sports connections in hopes of putting a long overdue end to an overused joke. Draymond Green, on the hand? He's not allowed to get so tired of said overused joke that he starts making cross-sports connections, because he's the reason that joke exists in the first place. As much as we will all say it did for the laughs, nothing the Indians didn't do can take away from what the Cavaliers did do - which was make history by face fucking the cockiest thin-skinned team in sports history 3 times in a row en route to their first championship.