ESPN Anchor Sara Walsh Returned From Maternity Leave...To Find Out She Was Part Of The Layoffs

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— Sara Walsh (@Sara_Walsh) May 4, 2017

Ahhh, the pitfalls of pregnancy. Ya know, people constantly refer to childbirth as a miracle, but they seem to forget that most miracles don't require you to clear your schedule for 9 months. A little time off seems like a small price to pay for starting a family....until that time off directly correlates with your company undergoing a massive house cleaning. Sara Walsh thought she was exercising her God-given right to motherhood, and in time it took for two fetuses to turn into identical human beings she went from peeing on a stick with job security to bloated and expendable. There's no doubt that having a baby is a blessing, but I think we can all agree that it would really be more convenient if they grew quicker than the contracts that inevitably changed a multi-national corporation's entire landscape. 

And how about ESPN just waiting until the day she's set to return to work to deliver (no pun intended) the news that she's now a full-time mommy? I don't know who was responsible for laying people off, but their face must have turned white when they read that Sara Walsh was set to return from maternity leave. The transition from the "Congrats! How are the kids?" conversation to the "so, about your employment" conversation is about as smooth as the cut to the crowning scene in 'Knocked Up'. You remember when you were in school and you just completely forgot about project until 6 hours before it was due? I imagine that sinking feeling was the same one that hit the director of the firing squad like a ton of bricks when he realized he had to follow up the birth of twins with a much more unpleasant discharge. I guess I can't really fault ESPN because they laid off people with much more prestige than Sara Walsh, but something tells me that the avoidance of the most awkward interaction of all time should have expedited her to the top of the call sheet. 

Congrats to the happy couple though! Those bundles might even become more joyous when they are joined by a severance package. ESPN: The Worldwide Leader In Stalling. 

Dressed em in clothes that still aren't even close to fitting them. Their Outfits are gonna be great next easter. pic.twitter.com/734SrEXrOM

— Sara Walsh (@Sara_Walsh) April 17, 2017