How About This Uninvited Crocodile Taking A Late Night Dip In The Pool With This Couple?

Back up the cement trucks. Time to turn that thing into a parking spot. Most people hardly use their in-ground pool as is. Imagine how useless it would become when you couldn't even sneak in a nightcap without first scouring the premises for piercing, predatory eyes? I'm not even someone that is overly concerned by what lie beneath bodies of water, but that tune would change real fast if I had my fore-foreplay interrupted by a goddamn prehistoric reptile. Probably never be able to swim or put my hand on the soaking wet waist of an eager female again without having flashbacks to getting croc-blocked. I'm sure the ensuing sex was pretty damn enthralling after that never death experience, but you can bet that it will no longer be taking place anywhere but indoors after a vigilante search under the bed and in the closet. Shit, it might not ever happen again if this chick watches this video of her significant other leaving her behind in the crosshairs of a crocodile while he splashes at it from safe ground enough times. That's a "fuck this, I'm out" that costing him at least a couple years worth of blowjobs.

Also, that crocodile sucks at crocodiling. Two completely vulnerable people that had no idea it was there and it couldn't even get an appetizer out of them? Put that thing to death. Not just because it's a danger to society, but because it's a disgrace to it's entire species.