Source- For the past month, Jonathan Harrington has been living every practical jokers' worst nightmare. The University of Miami student faced a felony drug charge and expulsion from school — all because, he insisted, he'd put out lines of powdered sugar as a gag before a dorm inspection.
When a police field kit returned a positive result for cocaine, though, no one was laughing.
Harrington's nightmare began August 30, when his dorm room was scheduled for an administrative search. The 21-year-old English major thought he’d have some fun by leaving lines of white powder, pills, and a rolled-up dollar bill on the coffee table and kitchen counter.
Harrington knew it was school protocol to call police when suspected drugs are found, but because the lines were just powdered sugar and the pills were simply aspirin, Harrington figured everyone would get a good chuckle out of the stunt and move on.
Instead, according to a police report, the powder tested positive for cocaine. Harrington was promptly handcuffed, hauled off to jail, and charged with felony cocaine possession.
For the past month, Harrington has maintained that the drug field kit yielded a false positive. It's not an uncommon problem, actually.
Harrington is slated to graduate next spring, but he says the experience is making him rethink his major: “This whole affair makes me consider law.”
WHAT?! The university didn't see the humor in the ol' cocaine/sugar gag? How can we even consider this "higher learning" if all the good pranks go right over the head of the administration. I thought college was about having an open mind and embracing creativity, but students can't even use fake narcotics for their prop joke? Whats next? Banning blackface? Is anyone allowed to have any fun anymore? Jesus, no wonder the whole world is becoming so uptight. Everyone is spending their formative years in institutions that completely lack the ability to get a laugh at the expense of potential drug abuse.
Listen Jonathan, I don't want to kill your spirit, I really don't. I am not much of a prank guy myself, but I can respect a good one when it is executed right. Part of proper execution is picking the right target. The people that are scouring your apartment as part of their crackdown on drugs? Not the right target for a drug joke. At some point the person you are putting one over on has to be able to find it funny, and cops aren't big laughers. You know that "police field test" that came back positive? There's a reason it came back positive, and that's because it was no more than an "eye test". It wasn't based on the findings of a drug kit, it was based on common sense. Law enforcement isn't wasting their time testing the consistency of a white powder found in a college dorm room. There are undoubtedly situations that are more deserving of their skepticism. You weren't vindicated. You can't be vindicated of your own stupidity. This shouldn't make you consider law. If anything it should put an end to your dreams of standup comedy, because your ability to read a room is severely lacking. Next time you are sifting through fake drugs try filtering your audience while you're at it.