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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

If You Were An MMA Fighter Would You Rather Get Busted For Using PED's Or Boner Pills?

8/22/2016

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Report: Jon Jones' Failed Drug Test Was Due to Cialis https://t.co/cJMsdFnJWO

— LowKickMMA.com (@LowKick_MMA) August 19, 2016

I am going to give Jon Jones the benefit of the doubt here, and say that he'll be glad it became public knowledge that he occasionally needs help getting his dick up if it means he gets to continue his oft-abbreviated career in the octagon. I am just saying, given his line of work don't you think that - if given the choice - he would have to think long and hard about telling the world he can't always "rise to the occasion"?  Turning over a suspension that allows you to keep making paychecks as one of the most revered fighters in all of mixed martial arts is a pretty big deal, but so is being the trained killer that's perceived as having a dysfunctional manhood. 

We are talking about one of the most physically gifted fighters in the world. A man whose mere presence is intimidating to other men that have dedicated their lives to hand-to-hand combat. Taking knockoff erection inducers would cause quite the chink in the armor of someone with such a bad ass aura, no? Nothing wrong with taking Cialis or any of it's cracked out cousins that you can scoop at your nearest shady rest stop bathroom or from the counter at your local 7-Eleven for a dime a dozen. I personally have never used them - despite a couple awfully embarrassing instances where I wish I would have - but even if I did they wouldn't be nearly as harmful to my public persona as they are to someone who competes in the most hyper masculine of professions.

I'm not saying that the ability to get hard on his own testicular merit is something that a fighter needs to be successful, but it's seems like something that he needs his competition to think he has to be successful. I guess when it comes down to it, you would have to choose a job and prescription woodies over no job and artificial strength, but I'll be damned if announcing that your most important muscle needs to be unnaturally stimulated would be an easy call to make. 



​P.S. Hey Jonesy, might be time to lay off the nose candy so you're not stuck looking like this when you're trying to sneak in a nightcap after a drug fueled bender...
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