I'm Expecting Millions In Copyright Infringement For This 'Chase Buttley' Thing That Mets Fans Think They Created
This was sooo funny, sooo clever, and sooo original....back in 2008 when I started saying it. Mets fans, and more specifically this little bitch in her $10 WalMart jersey, can get right the fuck out of my face. Kids these days. Entitled little brats I tell you. Think they can just throw poop emojis on everything and that automatically makes it their own. Hey sweetheart, no amount of cuteness and glitter can change the fact that you stole a man's well crafted butt joke. Just because you're adorable doesn't mean that I can't see through your evil, conniving ways.
I started saying 'Chase Buttley' so long ago that I completely forgot that it wasn't his actual name until this whole controversy surfaced. It's easy to refer to your opponent's second baseman as the part of the body that human excrement comes out of when he's responsible for one of the most dirty slides in recent history. It's not hard to make a 1st grade joke at the expense of a player that broke your shortstop's leg and completely changed the outcome of a postseason game by doing so. It's a lot more difficult to come up with it, as a piss drunk college student, when the player in question is a fan favorite that happens to play in a dumpster fire of a sports city that you hate with all your heart. That takes creativity. That is deserving of an entire stadium honoring the brilliance of your wordplay by chanting it throughout the stadium for all to hear.
If you want to start sending money then I will accept all forms of currency. $5 a sign, $1 a reference. Trust me, I know how much fun it is to say 'Chase Buttley' and it's well worth every penny. Pennies that will go a long way towards making sure I don't take you all to court for stealing the childlike concepts that were formulated in my alcohol infused brain over seven years ago.