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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

I'm So Glad Pavel Zacha Has A Girlfriend So He Has Some Time For Hockey

6/29/2015

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View original instagram or visit INK361
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View original instagram or visit INK361
I'm a simple man. A simple, simple man. So yeah, sue me if all it takes to cause some commotion in my boxer shorts is the Devils first round draft pick and his luxurious hair chilling shirtless with his smoke bomb girlfriend in a Devils hat. Seriously, I'm only human. You put that that much sexy in a bed and I am feeling some type of way about it every single time. Even if it is a couple of 18 year old Eastern Europeans. Pretty sure that's the age of consent, and thus it's not weird. Honestly, I am just happy this guy has a girlfriend. Six months in the states as a single man and we would have to wrap him in a latex body suit to avoid an Antonio Cromartie situation. I am pretty sure the entire city of Hoboken's water broke just looking at these pictures.  God forbid he finds out that New York City is only 15 minutes away. The last thing I need is this kid going under the knife before training camp to have women surgically removed from his cock. We should at least give the women of the tri-state area a chance by making him wear a hat in public. Watching him run his hand through his hair is the closest I have ever come to having a religious experience. Pretty sure he moistened my underwear with that move.

And by the looks of this video, I don't think we need to worry about Pavel having a confidence issue. That fucking firehose looks like it could replenish the entire California water shortage. We should give Katie Kindrachuk the 'Arthur Ashe Courage Award' for having sex with her boyfriend and the 2x4 in his athletic shorts on a regular basis. I'll tell you one thing I am not worried about is his stick handling. If it were anything less than superb he would already be wanted for murder by now. This draft pick is growing on me faster than he is growing underneath his girlfriend's ass cheek. You just don't go into the corner with that kind of testicular fortitude and not come out with the puck. Winger, center, I don't care. Pavel is already leading the All Star balloting for starting cocksman, and I couldn't be more excited about it. No homo....yet.
View original instagram or visit INK361
View original instagram or visit INK361
View original instagram or visit INK361
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