It Can't Be A Coincidence That All Three Bruins First Round Draft Picks Failed Their Conditioning Test, Can It?

NBC- All three of those top picks – Jakub Zboril, Jake DeBrusk and Zach Sensyshyn – failed the team’s conditioning test on Thursday, according to CSNNE.com.

Here’s a quick description of the drill, which could be filed under “reasons fans shouldn’t always envy professional athletes.”

The test consists of a series of six back-and-forth 300 meter sprints with three minutes of rest in between each run, and all of them must be completed in under one minute’s time.

There are some caveats, as GM Don Sweeney told CSNNE.com that they were running on a “wet, slippery turf surface.”

On the other hand, it’s worth noting that the trio fell short of the mark with that same test back in July.



Let's clear one thing up. None of us know shit about the NHL draft. Essentially all we know is whatever the "experts" tell us. Well, that and whatever we can see with our own eyes on grainy, 3 minute highlights films that are shot and narrated by some foreign motherfucker in a country that's undoubtedly not ours. With that said, when the Boston Bruins went off the board with three consecutive first round picks this past June, it was kind of a big deal. I know that because the people that are paid to tell me whether it was a big deal or not told me it was a big deal. It was such a disappointment, in fact, that some even slandered the prestigious name of one of the NHL's Original 6 teams by nicknaming them 'The Boston Ruins'. When I read this story my first instinct was to wonder why three players, that were selected far before they were supposed to be, decided to perpetuate the negativity surrounding their selections by staying as far away from a gym as possible during the offseason. Just straight up canceled their memberships and took a summer off before embarking on their NHL careers. It didn't make much sense to me considering they were blessed to be the beneficiaries of the scouting department's negligence. 

Then I sat down and thought about it. These guys were selected back-to-back-to-back, and for that reason they are ALWAYS going to be compared to each other. For better or worse, they are the future of the Boston Bruins and thus it behooves them to stick together. Once they failed their conditioning test in July they basically had two choices. They all bust their ass to get into varying degrees of shape before training camp....or they sit on that very same ass for a couple months and stay on an equal playing field. These guys may not be committed to the organization that selected them, but at the very least they are committed to each other. You can't accidentally leave a man behind when no one has the legs or lung capacity to get ahead. You think these guys wanted to embarrass themselves by failing their conditioning test? Of course not. However, they sacrificed their health, and potential futures in the NHL, to handle that embarrassment as a group. There's something to be said about their dedication to each other. There's something to be said about their desire not to let one person fail alone. You know in high school when the teacher is like "who did last night's reading?" and like one person raises their hand? No one likes that one person. That's why these three guys decided they just wouldn't put themselves in a situation where they could potentially become that person. Three out of shape teenagers in July is bound to result in at least one out of shape teenager in September, and I am glad these three overrated up and comers realized that. If one draft pick is going to be a lazy, good for nothing bag of fat then they all should be, because that's how you show you're a selfless team player.