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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Joey Votto Dropped An A+ Line On An Unruly Fan, But Proved Why It's Impossible To Argue With Stupid

5/24/2017

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Picture

No one better than Joseph Daniel.. #Reds @Reds @RT_Ohio pic.twitter.com/s6EU4gEPI7

— Keegan Haag (@THEkeeganhaag) May 23, 2017

Objectively speaking, Joey Votto won this war of words. Regardless of your opinion on how much wit is required to properly execute a well timed fat joke, doing so undoubtedly packs more of a punch than telling a professional baseball player who is hitting over .300 in the Major Leagues that he's no longer good at baseball. The Cincinnati Reds signed Joey Votto to 10 year, 225 million dollar extension in 2012, and - without having a visual of this loudmouth - I think it's fair to say he let his body and his pride go to shit well before that.  

Unfortunately, engaging the type of fan that pays entirely too much just to sit up front and insult the players he's sacrificing his (second or third) lunch money to watch is a no-win endeavor. Obviously anyone who appreciates professional athletes as the insanely skilled entertainers they are would score this round in favor of Joey Votto, but it's no surprise that his "opponent" kept swinging after a joke that certainly served as the bell. This exchange highlighted the complete lack of shame that one has to have to get into a pissing contest with a pro ball player, and it left said pro ball player running low on allowable retorts. Basically, it was an example of how thankless it is to argue with stupid, especially when stupid is sitting behind a screen safe from actually answering to his baseless taunts.

To put it in terms of video games, an overweight heckler​ is like the boss at the end of the level that aimlessly hurls fireballs while needing to be hit 100 times before he dies, and - due to his profession as a public figure - Joey Votto had a limited bag of libel to fire shots from. If rendering someone speechless is the ultimate sign of victory in shit talking then the jackass unseen still had a ways to go before he choked on his slanderous tongue. That's too bad, because Joey Votto clearly would have done an even better job slamming the door shut on his entire existence if he were at liberty to come unhinged. 
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