ForTheWin- “I’ll say this,” Norman said in the Washington locker room after practice on Thursday, when asked for a hint. “Since they sell beer on TV while kids are watching it, I’m thinking I might open a keg on the field, and I’m going to drink it on the field. And I don’t see that being on the rule book.”
Norman then pretended to open an invisible keg, pump it, and lift it above his head. It definitely wouldn’t have been immediately obvious what he was doing had he not just explained it. So the question is: Will the good people of America who’ve tuned into to watch the game know what he’s up to?
“If they don’t, I’ll explain it afterwards,” Norman said (or before, as it turns out). “I was kind of like, if they’re doing that, then why can’t my celebration be legal? I mean, you’re selling ads on TV, so why can’t my celebration be legal? It’s a catch-22, man. These guys are serious.”
I appreciate the message that Josh Norman is trying to send to a league that never quite gets the message. That said if you needed him to start tapping imaginary kegs in the end zone to realize that the NFL is a hypocritical organization then you've probably been a "victim" of far too many of those beer ads that he apparently intends to use as his "muse". Surely he has a point, but it's been a point that's been driven home so many times that it could probably benefit from mixing in a few waters or hiring a personal chauffeur. We get it. The NFL - without fail - does what's best for them financially even it goes directly against the "...but, but, but kids are watching" philosophy they have suddenly adopted to justify outlawing every dance move other than the two-step. It doesn't matter how many cans Josh Norman crushes during his binge drinking impression, I am not going to become anymore aware of or appalled by the NFL's shady business practices. That's not to say that I am against him doing the celebration, I just think that it's not going to make much of a difference because it sounds like it really fucking sucks.
Full disclosure? I haven't seen Josh Norman's rendition of 'Animal House', but - considering he had to explain what he was doing to a bunch of media members - my expectations are quite low. I mean, a group of reporters witnessed a professional athlete do a full on charade mocking the NFL's disciplinary policy and all they walked away thinking about was how little they would wanted to be teamed up with Josh Norman on game night. I would suggest he go back to the drawing board before he's standing in front of a 100,000 people looking like he's giving someone an under the table handjob while trying to make sure his fictitious beer is foamless. Doing a poor job of reenacting a full-on frat party after making a play probably falls under the category of "excessive" so it undoubtedly IS banned by the ever-changing rule book, but - more importantly - it makes a mockery of the game day habits of those that use booze to help them forget how watered down professional football has become.