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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Kobe Picks Iggy Azalea Over Swaggy P, and I Love Him for It

10/1/2014

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The rational move here would be for Nick Young to tuck his tail between his legs and cower in the corner. Absolutely ruthless statement by Kobe. I mean, It is a very vague question. We aren't really sure what context the question is asked in. Make no mistake though, Kobe's justification for his answer is an absolute kick to the dick of Swaggy P. Hey bro, you're girlfriend is more successful than you. Boom. Roasted.

Hey Swaggy, Hope you enjoyed last season. The boss is back and it's about to get real…mad real. You think you're going to lose 65 games this year and everything will be rainbows and unicorns then you got another thing coming. When the champ is away, the chumps will play. I'm sure Kobe is a huge fan of your antics. I would bet my life savings he wasn't smiling when you said you were the best shooting guard in the NBA.

This is the exact reason people hate Kobe Bryant. He is an awful, awful teammate. If you want a pep talk in the locker room after a poor half of basketball then you might want to demand a trade.  Bryant has one thing on his mind, championships. He doesn't care who helps him get them, and he doesn't care whose feelings he hurts in the process. If you suck, he is going to tell you that you suck. If you are missing open shots, he is going to take shots for you. That's bad news for the chuck artist commonly known as Swaggy P. 

Like I said before, The rational move for Nick Young would be to ignore the quote and pretend it never happened. There is no response to a statement like that. Bryant just emptied the chamber into Swaggy P's torso and kicked his lifeless body in the gutter. Unless you go the way of the rape joke, there is nothing that can revive Swaggy in this war of words. Everyone has the friend that gets overly personal when they feel threatened. Young doesn't strike me as the type. He strikes me as the type of person that truly believes he is more successful then Iggy. In fact, he probably thinks he is more successful than Kobe. When Swaggy was born his mother instilled in him the belief that he was the greatest person on the planet. He still carries that notion with him to this day.

I am glad Kobe started this feud early. I can't think of two people that could possibly get along less. There is a 2% chance that Kobe Bryant and Nick Young can coexist on the same court. There is a 0.00000% chance that Kobe Bryant and Swaggy P can coexist in the same universe. Should be fun to watch though.

Forget the rings. Forget the stats. Forget each player's place in basketball history. The only thing you need to look at is the nickname each player gave themselves.'Black Mamba' vs. 'Swaggy P' couldn't possibly embrace the differences between the two any better.

P.S.- Doesn't make much sense that people love Jordan and hate Kobe. Aside from the rape allegation (that was more than likely bullshit), they are virtually the same person.  
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On second thought, maybe he is talking about basketball...
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