Lightning Fan Drops A 'Johnson' Reference In Postgame Interview

A video posted by Cassilly (@pennyjanesmom) on May 19, 2015 at 3:57am PDT

God dammit lady, do you see what you did? You hurried him and you made him fuck up his joke. You know how long he has been saving that one up? Probably came up with it after Tyler Johnson's first goal of the night when Marty St. Louis was falling over himself. I bet he wrote it down on the back of his hand and searched out this reporter after the clock hit zero. He had one shot, one opportunity, and you made him miss it with your silly time constraints. He's probably sitting at home right now with his head in his hands going "two words? two words!? Stupid, stupid, stupid!". You had to put him on the spot and now he's got palms-a-sweaty, vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti. 15 seconds of fame straight down the tubes. If you bobble the handoff the rest of the play probably isn't going to go all that well, and if you botch the intro to a joke you have already compromised it's punchline. 

Why do reporters still do this? Does getting a drunk, delirious fan's point of view enhance the broadcast that much? If there is a person that agrees to take time away from drinking overpriced, domestic beer at a fan gathering to talk to a reporter then he probably doesn't have anything too constructive to say. She should probably just be happy he went with the cringeworthy Johnson play instead of trying to fuck Marty St. Louis right in his pussy. 

P.S. A 'Johnson' penis joke? There isn't even another Johnson on the Rangers . That joke may have flown better in the NBA or NFL, but not the whitest professional league in all of sports. Going to have to give this one a 2.1 out of 10. A single entendre that lacked cleverness, layers and spontaneity. Sometimes the jokes just funnier on paper dude. Maybe don't try so hard next time. 

P.P.S. Sincerely hope whoever is responsible for the Tampa Bay 3rd jerseys has been fired already.