Deccan Chronicle- A Greater Manchester-based man, who kept a 40-year secret that he was born with no penis, has shared his journey to have life-changing surgery.
In TLC's 'The Man With No Penis,' the 40-year-old Andrew Wardle revealed that he has bedded over 100 women and confessed his life-long secret to friends and family, including his unsuspecting long-term girlfriend Fedra, the Mirror reported.
Wardle said that he has told 20 percent of the girls the truth, adding that it is difficult to explain to a new girlfriend but when he has, some have been really nice about it, but one punched him because she was angry as she felt like he had lied.
Wardle, who decided to reveal the truth because he was "sick of hiding," will have a fully-functioning penis built from the skin, blood vessels and nerves on his arm, if the operation is successful.
I lead you with a story that my great Uncle used to frequently tell me...
"One dark night, in broad daylight,
two dead boys got up to fight.
Back to back they faced each other,
drew out swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
and came and killed the two dead boys."
Now, tell me that story couldn't somehow be configured to include "the man with no dick slept with 100 women". What does sleeping with a woman even mean when you are dick-less? I got to admit I am a little bit jealous. Don't get me wrong I love having the ability to have sex, but if I didn't have the means to do so I wouldn't know any better, right? Think about how many situations you could avoid where you inevitably make a mistake by letting your penis do the thinking for you. I actually think this story would sound more believable if the headline was "Dickless man lives a care free life of solitude and happiness by not letting the ominous power of the pussy guide his every move".
Am I taking "slept with 100 women" in the literal sense that he actually slept in the same bed with 100 women. If I didn't have a dick, there is not one person in this world I would ever let into bed with me. Sleeping with people sucks. You end up uncomfortable, restricted, mostly likely trying to find the most feasible way to a cure a dead arm. Sleeping in the same bed as someone is a necessary evil associated with sex and marriage. If the guy that can't have sex is crazy enough to get married then I have a whole new bag of questions.
If that's not the case and this guy just really enjoys going down on women then his jaw must be Jay Leno strong. I am actually a huge advocate of female oral satisfaction, but if there was no reciprocation, I think I would find a more productive way to spend my time. I certainly wouldn't be locking down girlfriends. One of the only positives of being in a relationship is consistent penetration. You take away that you basically just have a high maintenance roommate. No thank you.
P.S. He absolutely has the look of a man that would be bragging about cuddling with 100 different women. Most smug virgin I have ever seen...