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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Mike Tyson Didn't Steal An Ice Cream Bar At The U.S. Open, He Willed It Into His Possession

8/30/2016

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NYPost- Former heavyweight boxing champion Mike Tyson treated a Ben & Jerry’s kiosk at the US Open like it was his own freezer — reaching in and snagging an ice cream bar before strolling off without paying, multiple sources told The Post.

But it was the Brooklyn-born bruiser’s celebrity status and tough-guy image that prevented him from getting creamed by US Open officials.

“I was like, ‘Are you serious? Am I imagining this?’ (Tyson) was like, ‘I feel like having an ice cream’ and he just took it,” said one stunned worker, adding, “What are you going to do, fight him? He’s Mike Tyson.”

The troubled brawler lifted the lid of the freezer stand, scooped out the $5.50 “Half Baked” ice cream bar and strolled off without paying for it, the witnesses said.

The female worker behind the stand yelled, “Excuse me, are you going to pay for that,” but Tyson just ignored her and kept walking, according to the witnesses.



I am fully aware that headline reads like a shitty Chuck Norris joke, but that doesn't mean it's not the truth. I really don't think you can consider something stolen when there was not an ounce of subtlety involved in taking in. If there is someone to blame here it's probably every ice cream attendant that Mike Tyson has come into contact with in the past, because the alleged casualness with which he strolled off with it is fitting of someone that truly has no idea that 'Ben & Jerry's' bars cost money. I bet there's a ton of shit that Iron Mike thinks are free. Meals, drinks, sex, ear reattachment surgery. Poor guy is out there getting accused of theft by people who were too intimated by his presence to remind him that he was supposed to pay. How is that his fault? I think it's about time we hold our concessions operators to higher standards. Take that $5.50 out her paltry paycheck because if she really cared about it she would have made sure that one of the baddest men of all time paid full price for a delightfully creamy refreshment. Can't believe we are sitting here throwing dirt on the name of the funny guy with the lisp in 'Hangover' when we should be crucifying a woman in a silly hat for not fulfilling the one necessary duty of her job. Does she think she's getting reimbursed for occasionally sticking her hand in a cool freezer during the dog days of summer or something? Just seems a little accusatory to say someone robbed you when you were staring at the most recognizable face on the planet when it all went down. 
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